Saturday, January 29, 2022

Moments of Joy

I recently had a debate with a friend on life and our expectations of happiness. I told her I didn't believe it was realistic to expect a life of happiness. Good things happen and bad things happen. It's a roller coaster ride of ups and downs. It's the bad experiences that give balance and help us appreciate our good experiences. All we can hope for is a life of overall contentment as we negotiate the ride. However, MCS is on a whole other level and to mitigate the negativity of this ongoing experience, I search and revel in moments of joy no matter how small or mundane. Sometimes this is a challenge, but I persist. Every day.


I was thinking about this today as I did a basic household repair. One of my wall heaters started blowing cold air. This is not good on a 30 degree morning when all outdoor surfaces are thick with ice. Four years ago another wall heater refused to work. I called the local furniture store for advice. The heater was only a few years old. The woman on the phone said she'd ask her repair guy and get back with me. I waited. A week later I figured they forgot so I headed to the nearest hardware store and bought a new heater. I installed it myself rather than hiring electricians at $80 hour, because I'm just that kind of woman (cheap). But I hung on to the old heater in case the repair guy would contact me.

He did! A few days later he told me it could be dust clogging the electrical points causing it to just not turn on. Hmmm...if this is the case, it would be a horrible waste of money to throw it out so I cleaned it the best I could, put it in a box, and stored it in the back of my closet until the next heater dies.

Here it is 2022, four years later. I dug the box out of the back of the closet, cleaned the heater with an electronic duster which released a whole litter of giant dust bunnies I must have missed with the first cleaning, electrified it, crossed my fingers, and turned it on. IT WORKS! OMG! I almost threw this old heater away not understanding it was just taking a little rest. Such a joyful feeling to not only save money, but be self-reliant.


Another moment of joy this month...2022 is starting out very joyous! This is a good sign. 

I sent one of my handmade, collage Christmas cards to Girl Alive in Malaysia. This was a risk. We both knew it. With the pandemic, international mail has been problematic at best, but I felt risky. The woman at the post office did some odd things that should have given me pause, but I ventured forth and sent it anyway. This was in November over a month before Christmas. It never arrived for Christmas. I was disappointed, and reprimanded myself for being so risky, but oh well, if it would have arrived, it might have brought my friend some Christmas joy.

January 20th...IT ARRIVED! Two months later, but IT ARRIVED! I was so shocked I accused her of lying to me just to make me feel better. LOL! (Sorry, Girl Alive!) So in January, a month kind of blah for joy, my friend received some surprised joy! I felt such overwhelming happiness for something so simple and random. So wonderful.

I love moments of joy. They make life...content.




Thursday, January 20, 2022

Health Care Curse

It's a new year and I always like to think of it as a new beginning. A fresh start where everything will be wonderful and will proceed as it should be, not as it has been.

Health care...hmmmm....

First, I found myself a new doctor. Maybe. He's a functional medicine doctor and I'm impressed with some of his online videos. He likes to talk and since most doctors don't talk, I think I would really like a talker. I'm always full of hope and anticipation for the first appointment and then they fail miserably...BUT I'm not going to think like that! Be positive! It's a new year!

Second, I ordered a new thyroid prescription refill. This compounding pharmacy has failed every step of the way, but I stick with them because I'm not convinced another compounding pharmacy would be any better. I've had problems with all of them.

It takes them two weeks to refill the prescription and I'm out of medication and scrapping the bottle. The new refill came today! I was relieved. I opened it up, ready to dive into fresh drug. It won't come out of the bottle. Ummmm.... I shake it, and try again. I tear the label off because it covers the bottle and I want to see through it. I see nothing, but I think maybe the drug is on the side of the bottle or solidified on the bottom. It's hard to see through these brown pharmaceutical bottles. I got a flashlight and tried to peer in. Then I got a Q-Tip , shoved it in, and swished it around.

THERE IS NOTHING IN THE FUCKING BOTTLE. SHIT. They sent me an empty bottle? I paid for an empty bottle? Nice.


What is it with health care and me? We are enemies! Am I the only one with these experiences? Every step is a constant struggle. Am I cursed? Will I be cursed with bad health care experiences for the rest of my life? How can I possibly be positive for the new year when my bad luck persists?

The pharmacist apologized profusely, snatched up a new bottle, actually infused it with drug, and sent it. And charged me AGAIN!! Really? The snafus are never ending!

The end of my rant.

UGH!!!