We planned our first outing over a weekend since she lived three hours away. I invited her to arrive on Friday and stay the night. I figured this way if she failed at understanding my instructions and was willing to detoxify herself in my shower, that might work. She cancelled Friday because she felt "frumpy".
Oh, god, here we go! It all came rushing back. This is the friend who cancels at the last minute on a whim. She decided she would arrive Saturday morning. Hmmm...this is a risk, but I complied. I was eager to add an old friend back into my life so I took the chance. She showed up reeking of laundry detergent and I was sick all day.
Over the next few years she eagerly asked for fragrance-free advice, and I, with high hopes, gave it. I bought her $50.00 worth of soaps, detergents and other unscented, non-toxic supplies as encouragement. I had a feeling this would be a waste of money because if there is one thing I've learned, if people aren't fragrance-free, they won't get it. It's often beyond their comprehension.
We tried a few more outings and each time she stunk to high heaven for a variety of reasons: new detergent, new hair shampoo, new automobile air fresheners, and each time when I mentioned the need to stand away from her she looked at me like a deer in headlights. She just doesn't have the brain function to be fragrance-free. I learned with experience to avoid her. I ignore her constant requests for recreation and her empty promises of chemical sensitivity empathy.
During the pandemic she started sewing facial masks. I applauded and encouraged her efforts. She offered to send me one. OK! Masks are not easy to come by so I was excited to get one. She informed me she'd sew it then hang it outside for a few hours. I've heard from so many to "hang things outside". Do people really think airborne virus germs will just go away with a good airing out? I'm not sure the reasoning.
She sent three masks. I was excited. They were all sealed in plastic bags. As soon as I opened one I could smell the stench of laundry soap. REALLY? I put them outside on my porch. Even the plastic bags were smelly. I tried to wash a plastic bag. Nope. The stink stuck. I took one of the masks and tried washing it. I tried five times. Still stinks.
You can't imagine how disappointed I was. Not only that she went all the trouble during a stay-at-home lockdown to mail them to me, but she still doesn't get it. I didn't want to confront her in light of her generosity, but I did ask if I could donate one to my nurse friend who didn't have a mask and she was happy to comply. I donated all three.
Eventually the subject came up when she was commissioned to make masks for a senior care center. I suggested she not wash them in fragranced laundry detergent. She responded with, "But I didn't use any detergent when I washed yours!" But she washed them in a washing machine contaminated by her toxic laundry detergent. If that stink was just residue, she's using some really toxic detergent these days. I tried patiently explaining and her response was, "Well, it's really too bad, but some people just can't comply."
So how do I tell this so-called friend, who claims she cares about me, misses me, and still after that conversation constantly asks, "How are you doing?" or "Can we Facetime?" that she is one of my poisoners? She and those like her who wear toxic stink contaminate the air that should be shared and affect where I can go and how I exist? How do I tell her she's not a friend at all, but that she's one who makes me miserable and is trying to kill me?
Anyway fellow MCSers, beware of handmade, toxic facial masks! They might be made with fabrics that have been treated with chemicals or washed in toxic laundry detergent!
I found some patterns online.
This one is my favorite. It has one piece that you cut six times so no multiple pieces to figure how to fit together. It has a little pocket for a coffee filter. The video instructions are fast and easy:
Here is the website address: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3aUSBLlsvSo
One is called the Olson and it's the one hospitals are requesting if people want to make and donate. It has a pocket for a fancy hospital filter that the hospital will add, but I think the average person can use a coffee filter or other. The video is a little wordy and long so I skipped through the babble to get the instructions. You can find the pattern pieces online with scanty instruction. I'm not much of a seamstress otherwise so I needed really clear, visual guidance:
If you sew your own, you are able to choose non-toxic fabric that doesn't stink. I used used, cotton sheets. Organic would be optimal, but I wasn't willing to cut apart my very expensive organic cotton sheets just to make a mask. A study showed tightly woven cotton sheets up to 200 count are nearly as good for protection as N95 masks. Cotton is more comfortable than synthetic fabrics especially during the warmer summer months. I also added a stitched pocket across the top and used wide twist ties for the nose fitting part. I like the simplicity of elastic loops over the ears that wouldn't get tangled in my hair, but they proved to be painful and uncomfortable and then kept falling off when my ears got tired. I also tried elastic over the head and ties over the head, both fine, but tangled in the hair.
I only had white sheets so they look like face diapers! I like it that so many are now wearing masks so I don't feel like a social misfit when I do wear one. I can now walk into most smelly stores and feel somewhat protected!
