Let the War Begin...Again.

Yesterday I happened to be out on my porch, enjoying the sunshine and fresh springtime air, and I noticed the soft buzzing of a bee. I enjoy bees. Hearing them buzz around the garden is a sign spring is here and that's always a happy sign. They pollinate my flowers and trees and I grow plants that will attract them. We have a mutually respectful, reciprocal relationship.

I smiled at the sound and looked up from what I was doing just in time to see a pretty little bee land on the side of my house and crawl IN THROUGH A SMALL HOLE under the siding. OH SHIT! I've seen online photos of giant hornet's nests or bee hives in the walls of houses. I watched for a few seconds as three or four more bees landed and disappeared. I ran upstairs to see if I could hear any buzzing in the walls. No. Then I ran to the hardware store in a panic.


The hardware man's first suggestion was to use a fogger. No way. I think a fogger would kill me. Another suggestion was hornet traps, but those would attract every hornet and bee in the area and kill them. I just want to repulse them away. I don't want uninvited, free-loading roommates with stingers loading honey into my walls. Then someone suggested hornet spray even though I assured them I couldn't see a nest nor even knew where it was. Doesn't matter. The spray will confuse the bees and they will leave or die. There were also "green" or "safe" solutions rather than chemically-based sprays. The one I ended up buying is called WHY. Of course it costs twice as much as the chemical spray. The ingredients are: lemongrass oil, clove oil, rosemary oil, and geranium oil. I don't care for essential oils, but I've used a similar recipe to kill mold. I needed something and I'd be spraying it outside.

Covered in oil. Ewww.

I sprayed it on one side of the house where they were entering and hoped there wasn't another entry way. It stunk to high heaven, leaving oily drips down the side of the house, but tolerable. As I emptied the can I smelled a distinct alcohol smell, like rubbing alcohol. Yep, it has isopropyl alcohol in it, too, probably as a stabilizer for the oils or propellant. For the next hour I watched the bees frantically trying to figure out how to get into their hole, but unable to go near or land due to the stink. It seemed to be working. I kept an eye on them to see if they were flying into another entrance but it looked like they were flying away only to return to try a few minutes later. Hooray!

Later that evening as I went upstairs to bed the whole upstairs area smelled strongly of essential oils. Obviously they were getting into one of the crawlspaces in the roof. I prayed the bees wouldn't find a way into the house as they tried to escape the stink. I think this spray would work on spiders and rodents as well!

WRONG! It doesn't work on anything. Maybe that's why it's called WHY? WHY doesn't it work? Yes, the smell repelled them for a few hours, but by the next morning the smell had all but worn off and they were going in and out of the holes again. I raced again to the hardware store and bought some foam to plug up the holes. This stuff is a special recipe with pesticide in it although it doesn't smell much. I used it on the crawlspace as the instructions say bugs and rodents won't nibble on it because it tastes bad. Applying it sure is messy! By the time I finished plugging up the little holes I had the sticky, icky stuff all over. Seriously, I even dribbled it down the side of my face! The instructions say it comes off with acetone. No way! Or it'll wear off. I remembered tree pitch will come off with mayonnaise so I tried a mayonnaise facial. It removed the sticky part but the foam residue is still there. It looks like I have wrinkles. Well, more wrinkles. Uglier wrinkles.

Confused bee looking at globs wondering what the hell?

Again, I spent an hour watching the confused bees fly from one hole to the next not comprehending why they couldn't get past the unsightly glob of goo. They are very determined to damage my house. More than likely I've trapped the queen in my attic space. <shiver>

I got fed up with their never-ending determination so as soon as the foam was dry I grabbed the broom and started swatting them. They aren't going to return if they are dead! So much for our mutual respect and reciprocity. I have my limits.

So I armed with a broom and saw what I hope is the last living bee on earth. I swing...and the force of my killer swing forces me to step off the porch step. Unfortunately I thought I was on the last step and I wasn't. I overshot the last step, twisted my ankle, and fell smashing my foot into the cement. PAIN. Damn bees have now crippled me.

This house is a never-ending battlefield....