Van Life Has Changed Me...

Van life is challenging on a good day, although I can say now after three months it's getting better. I often wonder how it will affect my life in general. Will it be a positive influence overall or will it be one big regret? Will I eventually have nightmares and nightly ruminations about van dwelling much like I have been tormented about past jobs for most of my life? 

A friend of mine recently pondered about aging and as people get older they tend to migrate toward conservative, conventional thinking and become narrow minded, stuck in their ways while lacking in flexibility and opened-minds. I pondered back, maybe as we age we become wise, knowing what we like and what we don't? I think about this and wonder how van life will change me and how it already has. Here are some of the ways I feel I have changed from this experience in just three months (I may add to the list later):

10.) Buying in Bulk No More! I used to buy in bulk to get the best deals: cases of toilet paper and paper towels, packages of toothbrushes, etc. I still shop like that if I see a sale I want multiples. There is absolutely no extra room in a van. This forces me to rethink my spending habits and hopefully adjust my mindset. I still have three gallons of Ecos laundry detergent in my van. Eventually it'll get used freeing up more space, but now that each gallon is up to $30 (I bought them for $8 each!), they stay.

9.) I've become a non-toxic laundromat assessment expert. That is my new title. Impressive, eh? Prior to living in a van, I think I might have entered a laundromat twice in my life. I now know if the laundromat doesn't have top loading washers, don't even bother as other machines are too toxic to use since the detergent trays harbor the stink of Gain and other nasty poisons. They cannot be cleaned enough to be safe. I know this. I've tried. I'm thinking if van life ever ends I'll start a non-toxic laundromat business. There is definitely a need.

8.) I'm masquerading as a dog lover. To be clear, I don't hate dogs. I hate bad dog owners. My motto, "No such thing as a bad dog only bad dog owners." A majority of van dwellers have dogs: barking dogs, roaming dogs, shitting dogs, howling dogs, smelling dogs. There is no benefit to look like you hate the people you are camped next to and looking like you hate their dog is way worse. So I am friendly as fuck. I know all the dogs' names. I call them over to me. I snuggle and give them love. Recently, I house sat for some friends. Their son lives on the property and has FIVE barking dogs. FIVE!!?? My personal hell. But those dogs came up to the front door every morning and I dutifully went outside to greet them, talked baby talk, and gave them pets. I'm convinced I am possessed by some dog demon. Who would have ever thought?

7.) No-preparation food. I currently do not have a refrigerator, however, this is soon to be remedied. For many reasons, I now prefer no-cook, no-clean up meals. Cooking is a major endeavor that entails hauling out all the equipment from the back of the van, setting up, actual cooking, then clean up that utilizes a minimum of a gallon of water. Water is precious in van life. Bottom line, food preparation is a messy harassment. It's exhausting. My old rug is evidence sporting unsightly stains, general discoloration, and burn marks. I now avoid cooking inside the van, but bad weather sometimes requires it. My diet restricts processed food, restaurant food, leftovers, besides the long list of banned products which makes feeding myself a challenge anyway, but sometimes when the weather is bad or I'm just tired, I throw all caution to the wind and opt for a restaurant meal, or any non-cookable food out of the grocery store. After a lifetime of daily and elaborate healthy food preparation, this is so different!!

Before the rug was stained and burned...see it in the background?

6.) Exercise. I exercise now more than I ever have in my life! My Bluetti weighs 60 lbs and for a while before I acquired solar power, I used to have to lug it to the side or back of the van to charge it. I'm constantly crawling under the bed looking for things or curling up to fit into tight spaces. I am up and down the side steps, climbing my telescopic ladder to wash solar panels or the van, hoisting myself into the front seat, or catapulting myself into bed which is much like the bunk beds I had when I was a kid only without a ladder. I carry heavy glass jugs of water, move supplies, reorganize totes, crawl under the van, and transfer gallons of water to buckets. Today I lifted and transported a 40 lb. bag of pine pellets from the hardware store to my van. This is not uncommon and it's never-ending. Never mind the constant reorganization of my storage unit and I still try to walk everyday. I constantly think, I am way too old for these acrobats and deep knee bends (let alone any bends!). I worry about overexertion which will trigger autoimmune attacks, but it is what it is. I am feeling fine. My muscles are stronger, I haven't pulled anything out of place, and my stamina is increasing. 

5.) I'm working on a laptop after a lifetime of working on only a desktop. I swear a lot. It tends to do what it wants when it wants, and I'm constantly having to stop and correct the problems. It's a much slower process. Besides the screen is so damn small.

4.) Starfucks. I don't have internet in my van (yet) so I am required to find it out in the wild. Starfucks is one of those places. They used to allow people to walk in without buying anything to use their stores and bathrooms which I think is very good customer service. I could sit there all day and work for free which is outstanding marketing. This is a company that makes millions in profits overcharging people for drinks that might cost them 25 cents in supplies. I would think they can afford to allow people to use their facilities because a majority of their addicted caffeine-fiends will buy their overpriced products anyway to cover for the rest of us.

4:30am...the best time to visit. So quiet!

Unfortunately, the company decided they needed more money and imposed a purchasing "entrance fee" in order to sit in their store and use their bathroom. I don't drink caffeine or sugar, but I started buying a small cup of plain coffee if anything to avoid the stink eye of the counter peons. One of those peons yelled at me one morning, "IT'S NOT SMALL, IT'S TALL!" Oh, marketing bullshit. What a waste of $2.71. (Do the math times 30 that is how much it costs a month to use their internet almost more expensive than actual internet service!) A couple times I gave the cup of coffee to a homeless guy begging at the counter or someone sitting without a drink (oh! horrors!). Then I switched to a small (TALL!) glass of apple juice that within an hour would knock me on my butt from the sugar. I finally switched to water. $3.20 for a small (TALL!) bottle of water! What a rip! But at least I can use it and because I've started buying water every morning, the peons no longer glare at me.  I never used to patronize Starfucks. My favorite location claims to be the largest in the country. I find a corner to hide in and at 4:30am, there are few people in the store. They play good music. A few hours later when it starts getting crowded from all those caffeine-fiends needing their fix, I leave. It works for now. I look forward to getting internet in my van....

3.) I have become a plastic hoarder! I never used to buy plastic Ziplock bags. Plastic destroys the environment and pollutes the oceans. I am now addicted. Everything I own in the van is plasticized in a freezer bag. I buy them in different sizes. They keep everything contained and dry. Ziplock is the best brand. I also hoard plastic grocery bags and use them for a variety of bigger things that don't fit in a Ziplock such as document containment, garbage, and poop. They don't work well for urine as most are not water-tight, but when one needs to poop, using two bags, plus a Ziplock, plus a third bag works well. Sometimes I will go into a store, buy five items and  come out with each item in a plastic bag. Other times I just grab a handful as I'm ready to leave. I worry one day Walmart security will stop me and accuse me of theft. Although most stores utilize the thin, lightweight plastic bags, some stores have really thick, heavier plastic grocery bags. However, all plastic grocery bags are sturdy enough for carrying heavy groceries and are so handy for a variety of needs when living in a van.

2.) Walmart-ness. I boycotted Walmart for years, especially during the Bush and Dump presidencies because Walmart supports the Republican Party. I find in a van I'm less concerned about politics and truthfully, I just don't give a damn what a bunch of rich people who have overthrown the country do with their time. There is nothing I can control, nothing I can change, so why should I stress over this? Now I shop at Walmart everyday. This is the store with the cheapest water refills. They also sell high priced bathroom bags for camping, those Ziplocks I'm addicted to, vinegar, ammonia, and yogurt all at a cheaper price than other stores. I don't buy food at Walmart. I'm not that crazy, but they do have some gluten-free and organic products. Walmart is everywhere so I always have a place to get supplies and I'm usually shopping at 6am when there are no lines. Most Walmarts allow vans to park in their parking lots overnight. I have never done this, but if in a pinch late at night needing a place to stay, that's where I know I can go. As a van dweller, Walmart is now my friend.

1.) One of my greatest pet peeves are people who wear pajamas in public, usually flannel, printed pajama bottoms, but I have also seen a full set of pink printed outfits with matching bunny slippers walking right down the street. I've always considered these people failing miserable at fashion and just plain lazy. GET DRESSED, PEOPLE! I am now thinking maybe all this time I have missed the point!? Maybe pajama-wearing people are the free thinkers? Those not concerned about what others think? Only caring about being exceptionally comfortable? Are they the hippies of our current day and age? I am considering as a van dweller, I should be wearing pajamas!! I love my pajamas and it's not like I get to wear them "around the house" anymore! This thinking is SO RADICAL! I have not yet gone to the lingerie-wearing dark side although yesterday I was modeling my brightly striped pajama bottoms while I was sealing up holes in the bottom of the van only because they are old and I figured if I got oil and dirt all over them, it wouldn't matter. I had a visitor!! Did I flinch or run to hide? Nope. I proudly wore my PJ pants in public. I think about it all the time and I'm close to becoming a full-time free spirit. Soon....Maybe.

I think I've become a person that just doesn't give a rat's ass about things that used to bother me, less anal retentive and compulsive, less judgmental, and less stuck in my ways? I have become an ultra free thinker and doer! I think van life might be contradicting the ill effects of aging!!