Pondering Existence

I saw this online. I love brainstorms that make me question my existence. 

"If you had the opportunity to call yourself ten years ago, but only had sixty seconds to talk, what would you say?"

This would be a can of worms...2016 is just before the pandemic.

1.) "There is a pandemic due to hit around January 2020...Stock up on supplies especially toilet paper, rubbing alcohol, and N96 masks." Would I have listened to myself? Probably not. I was warned in advance from a friend living in Asia to do just this. I did not understand the seriousness of this advice so my supplies were not nearly stocked enough. I did, however, already have a huge supply of toilet paper having just cancelled my membership with Costco. The one N96 mask I used for art had to last me about six months!! It was pretty worn out once I was able to get a supply!

2.) "Apply for unemployment and grants immediately. Don't sit around for long wondering if you should."

3.) "DO NOT go to work for that idiot herbalist!" I worked for her about a week before the pandemic lockdown started and I'm pretty sure that's where I got COVID. Otherwise, I was typically pretty isolated in my day to day life. I don't know if not going to her house and being exposed to her children would have prevented me from getting COVID another way, but...

4.) "If you get COVID, don't drag your sick self out of bed to getting the test." For the first six months the COVID tests were only 20% accurate. Why bother?

5.) Prepare to sell the house and move. Start getting rid of belongings in 2017 and get rid of EVERYTHING!" It took me about two years to get rid of everything and much of it was donated or given away in the end. If I would have started early maybe I could have sold more? Or I would have become tired of selling anyway. Maybe this wouldn't have been possible since so much was shut down for so long during the pandemic? I don't know if eBay was working during the pandemic.

6.) "Put the house up for sale in 2021". My neighbors sold their house in 2021 and got top price. By the time I put it on the market in 2024, everyone was doing the same thing and the competition was too hard.

7.) "Buy a house or buy land and build something else immediately (before 2023) before the real estate prices are through the roof."

8.) "Sell the van in 2021 and buy another either new or in Arizona so it hasn't been contaminated with mold."

9.) "Do not waste your money on those functional medicine quacks. They are all idiots charging too much money for knowing very little! Just know you have Hashimoto's and Mast Cell Activation Syndrome all from a mold saturated body and go from there!"

I wonder if I could say all that in sixty seconds? I'm pretty sure when I finished my 2016 self would say, "Hmmmm....WHAT? Let me get a pen and could you repeat that?" I guess I should start with, "GRAB A PEN FAST!" Well, then my 2016 would have said, "Who the hell is this?"  Or hung up! OK, I doubt if I'd even answer the call from my own phone number identifying my own name! I'd think it was a scam. LOL!

What would you tell yourself ten years ago in sixty seconds?

Trauma Anniversary

August 1, 2026: Exactly one year ago today I slipped on a muddy beach, twisted my ankle, fell on top of it, and heard it crack loudly as two bones broke in half. What a horrible experience!  The year has gone fast, but the trauma still haunts me. Anytime I encounter a wet surface, I panic, assess the situation, and proceed cautiously. The hardest part of the total experience was realizing how alone I am in the world. No matter what happens to me, there is absolutely no one who would ever help me survive it...other than complete strangers who through their own humanity and compassion would volunteer to assist. I had to figure out how to get out of a foreign country, how to drive with my left foot, how to fight with health care to get the care I needed, how to drive across country without being able to get out of the van, how to survive the horrible physical therapy bitches, and how to work through the pain to be able to walk again. That experience accentuated how vulnerable I now feel living in a van especially as I age.

On the positive side, I can walk! There were times when I wasn't sure if that would ever be possible again. I can even hike! I'm not always walking comfortably due to the pain of the hardware and stiffness caused by cold weather freezing that hardware, but I can walk! I survived one of life's challenges and that makes me feel self-reliant as hell!

Other than wet and/or slippery surfaces that now make me pause and give me a nervous breakdown, this made me ponder what other trauma recalls do I have? What little quirky behaviors do I exhibit when confronted with a not-so-good past memory? 

For instance, I hesitate when I walk on wood, especially old wood. I'll usually stop, assess the surface, maybe give a little tap or careful bounce to see if it's stable. Why? When I was eleven years old my father told me to get something out of the barn. As I recall he was in the middle of castrating a bull so he wanted me to do it quickly. I took off like a bat out of hell, ran up the rickety flight of outside stairs to the second story of the barn. I grabbed whatever it was he wanted, turned, ran back across the second story, jumped through the door archway over a piece of wood that went across the floor at the base of the archway, and landed on the stairwell's landing. The landing broke and I fell through down one story into the chicken coop underneath the stairs. I was bruised, but not injured. With the wind knocked out of me, I was unable to move for several minutes as chickens clucked and nervously fidgeted around me. I guess it made a loud sound because my whole family came running. Any kind of rickety wood: boardwalks, stairs, planks, decks, walkways, etc., and I freeze for a minute, assess the surface, tap my foot, and carefully proceed. 

I also run if a man asks me to get something for him. I get adrenaline spikes if I hear a dog bark. I'm always hesitant to swim in ponds and lakes that are not crystal clear. Hmmm...what else?

What trauma recalls do you have?

Oregon Coast and into Washington! Day Thirteen and Fourteen!

July 19, 2026: My overnight just south of Cannon Beach on Highway 101 was quiet once the traffic died down, but not optimal. I was parked next to a wall of blackberry vines. Unfortunately, they were not ripe. Not even close.

I got up early, washed my hair with a bucket of cold water (I couldn't wait any longer!), and headed to Cannon Beach to beat the Sunday crowds. I found my favorite fish and chips place and OMG! It now costs $20 for fish and chips. No thanks.  I don't even care if they are gluten free! I walked the town, ate breakfast in my van, then left.

Seaside was next on my route. I used to walk this beach all the time. It was freezing cold, cloudy, drizzly, but I was determined to walk every beach on the coast so I trudged right through that sand down to the water. Brrrrr!!! However, the clean ocean air was refreshing and I kept taking deep breaths!

I saw a shower icon on iOverlander and thought I'd check it out. It supposedly costs only $1. Unfortunately, it was in the Fort Stevens State Park in their campground. Hmmm...not sure if I would be even allowed to use it, although it says online it's permissable. Online also says time is unlimited, but the water got lukewarm then cool really fast! It felt so cleansing after too long without a shower and too many hikes and beach walks!  This is good if I'm going to visit a friend.

Drove to Astoria. As soon as I got to Warrenton, I felt strangely depressed and kept almost crying. Trauma recall hits hard. I really don't want to be here. I have no desire to be close to my former residence. Twenty years of horrible neighbors, toxic polluted air, mold, and general stress took its toll. I parked by the food co-op, walked to the Astoria Sunday Farmer's Market, then back to the food co-op where they were having their 52nd anniversary with free food! I spent the rest of the afternoon reading and wondering if I should cross the Astoria-Megler Bridge and be in no man's land. I wondered if I could do it without a meltdown?

Later in the day with encouragement from my friend claiming her house is NOT in the town of horror, I braved the drive up the Washington Coast to visit her. I cried the whole way. I worried the van would break down and I'd be stuck in that horrible town. Or maybe I'd get in a wreck and be transported to that hospital of hell. If I didn't want to visit my friend, I would have avoided Washington. The visit was wonderful! I also handwashed my stinky wool blanket and Goodwill garments and hung them to dry in her yard. It was so strange to be there after too long, but the visit with her incredible family was just what I needed!

July 20, 2026: Spent the day lounging around, catching up with my bestie, and waiting for that damn blanket to dry. It still smells. All this washing doesn't seem to do a bit of good. Walked to the artesian well just down the forest road from her house for water refills. I used this well for my drinking water for years.

My friend's son and his girlfriend were also visiting. He lives in a painted camper and she in a huge painted storage freezer truck. His girlfriend is an artist and travels around to various festivals selling paintings and handmade clothes that are printed onto fabric from her paintings. She also does on-site painting at these festivals for free entry. He does on-site poetry writing and often works for Burning Man helping with the logistics. My friend joked she should start a campground and charge us! LOL!

My friend's house is an art museum with her walls filled with art. I love being surrounded by this creativity. She has so much of my art on her walls and displayed all over. I had forgotten. It made me cry since so much of the art I had has disappeared from my life. YES! I used to do art in another lifetime!!!

Although the weather is nice and cool, it's DAMP! All my Mast Cell Activation Syndrome symptoms have returned: burning eyes, face and body, sore throat, joint pain, coughing constantly, congestion, runny nose. I can't stay long. There is too much mold in the air.

Oregon Coast! Day Twelve!

July 18, 2026: I would have thought being up on a hill directly above the ocean would be incredibly wet, but my windows aren't even covered with mist. Maybe there is more wind up here to keep everything drier. Quiet night. I woke up to gray clouds and cold temperatures. Had a nice, relaxing morning doing nothing, then started driving north. I'm not feeling it today....

First stop, Rockaway Beach and the Big Tree Trail that is about a half mile of boardwalk into a wooded area with giant cedar trees. 

There were plants on the side of the boardwalk, HUGE plants that looked like skunk cabbage only five times larger. I stopped a man and asked and he said they were skunk cabbage. No way!!! Everything is giant here!

There were two trees that were massive.

I drove into Rockaway Beach. I am now in familiar territory! I know this town. I know Nehalem Bay which is the next town. I know Manzanita. All towns were incredibly crowded with tourists since it is a Saturday. The beaches looked like California beaches with people all over and I had no desire to do any beach walking. I saw a whole line of people sitting on a row of beach benches staring at their phones. Why do go the beach to stare at a phone? I did find a little health food store in Manzanita with handpainted tables! I appreciate a handpainted table!!

I checked out a few little trade libraries, walked the towns, and bought a bottle of what used to be my favorite wine at Nehalem Bay Winery. I used to buy cases of this stuff and use the bottles as hostess gifts, etc. It's been one of those days where I just want to drink the whole thing...

Oregon has the worst drivers. At first I thought the worst were in Massachusetts followed by Tucson, but Oregon drivers are consistently and purposely thoughtless and reckless. For example. Nehalem isn't a very big town so they don't have stop lights. There is one major intersection where highway 101 going north runs through town and then turns to the left. The 101 traffic from the north going south has a free right turn. The traffic that is coming from straight ahead has a stop sign. WHAT A MESS! But then throw in a line up of bad, inconsiderate drivers and it's a catastrophe. I wasn't there very long, but I crossed this intersection a few times. It was suicide as a cross-walker with some drivers motioning me to walk and others nearly running into me, then another guy who got mad because I wasn't walking because the other car wasn't stopping and he starts waving his arms at me illustrating his impatience! (I shook my head and laughed at him.) Good god! I watched a free right turn driver stop for a whole family of pedestrians and everyone behind him leaned onto their horns aggressively. So impatient as if they really have anywhere to be in this tiny town. I watched as the free left turn almost ran into someone running the stop sign. This small intersection is just a microcosm of what I've seen all over Oregon. They get really pissed off if I'm driving the speed limit on 101 and why can't these people stay in their own lanes?? Too often I round a corner and there is a truck coming right at me over the center line! I've even encountered bicyclists over the center lane! Do they have a death wish?

I'm testy. Maybe it's because I'm on the northern end of the Oregon Coast which is much more touristy and crowded with rude, entitled people. Not just drivers. I walked through these touristy towns, every now and then stopping to look at clothes displayed outside. Fashionable, overly made-up stinkers smelling like French whores would step in front of me or nearly run into me as they loudly talked to whomever they were with not even aware I was there. Sometimes they'd bang into me then look at me with daggers wondering why I was in their space. I'd be walking down the sidewalk and couples walking toward me wouldn't even move a little to let me by. It was exhausting being invisible and having to protect myself from getting pushed off the sidewalk.

Why do I feel so stressful? Then it dawns on me. I have plans to visit a friend in Washington. Do I want to even for a day get close to my old residence? This feels like trauma recall of a different kind. Years of hell living in that backward town surrounded by barking dogs and horrible neighbors. The idea is creeping me out, but I really want to see my friend.

Oregon Coast! Day Eleven!

July 17, 2026: Although this Blue Heron parking field is filled to the brim with traveling vehicles, it was a quiet night. However, it is so cloudy, drizzly, and damp here! This is why I moved from the coast. The thought of living in this weather again is TRAUMA RECALL! No wonder I have a body full of mold of every kind from growing up in the Pacific Northwest. I hope my van survives this trip. I constantly study the weather all over and both Arizona and Colorado are getting thunderstorms and flooding right now. At least it's not full-blown raining here, but where do I go that has warm, but mild temperatures and is dry? 

I checked my oil, coolant, and filled window washer. Later I noticed the floor in front of my passenger seat is soaking wet!!?? Is the window washer leaking? Oh, for god's sake - it's always something! It's exhausting!

I headed to the Tillamook Creamery for a self-tour. Very nicely organized. The self-tour is an upper floor with windows overlooking the factory including all kinds of educational explanation. 

It was fascinating watching these people get paid to check the steps of packaging the cheese. Some of them sit. I could do that!

I asked at the information desk and was informed one can sign up for more in-depth tours. The cheese tasting tour was something like $17 and the ice cream tasting tour was $49. Watching people work the conveyor belt got me thinking so I asked, "What personal hygiene rules do these employees have since they work around food?" I explained it's clear they wear hair nets, gloves, etc. I didn't ask for any specifics, but she said, "No jewelry, no make up, no fingernail polish, etc." I bet they aren't allowed to wear perfume! This might be my dream job! I could sit around looking at cheese all day for money! I wonder if it gets horribly boring?

Next I headed to Oceanside to see Three Arch Rocks and Maxwell's Point. The town is gorgeous, built on a cliff. Some of the roads were a little narrow and steep. Unfortunately, it was crowded!  The very small parking lot and tiny side of street parking were full. I'm not sure what Maxwell's Point was. Google Maps took me up to the top of a cliff, told me to turn left, but there was a huge metal gate, so no access. I turned around, meandered through twisty roads and ended up at a trail to Short Beach with a parking space on the side of the road waiting for Big Blue. Nice hike down with steps. Gorgeous beach. 

Notice this last photo. There are houses up on that cliff ledge. See the landslide?? Good god, I wouldn't want to own a house up there!!

I drove up the hill and found Cape Meares with a lighthouse. At the parking lot closest to the lighthouse a sign said I needed a parking ticket. I looked all over for instructions, saw a sign that said the Federal Interior of Something managed it so I thought, It's national so my America the Beautiful pass should work! Maybe? I hiked to the lighthouse and asked at the gift store. They said no, it's a state park, move your ass! (No, they didn't really say that. They were very nice.) I never really know especially since so many capes and lighthouses do take the card. So I hiked back up to the parking lot, drove the 1/2 mile driveway, and parked at the top of the driveway where there are no parking ticket signs. I did a little hike to the largest spruce tree in Oregon. There was a Y in the trail and I was told it goes to the lighthouse. I considered it, but I was already tired. Then drove to the top of another hill called Cape Meares Lookout overlooking the whole cape and relaxed. I need to remember to relax. I'm not in a hurry to see everything in one day. I have another two and a half months to kill!

View from Cape Meares Lookout

I was just going to relax that afternoon and go back to the Blue Heron for the night, but then I thought, Just stay here for the night! There isn't enough room for it to be as crowded as the Blue Heron! There are no "No Overnight" signs. This is the place!" So I did. Tourists kept stopping, but there isn't much to look at so they leave quickly. 

Around dusk, four other vehicles pulled in for the night. Two cars, one van, and one camper pickup. Three of them parked sideways which I thought was incredibly rude to take up all the parking spaces, but I've learned people are just thoughtless and rude! One tourist car with two women pulled in, parked right next to me, but the passenger couldn't see me in the van due to the tinted windows. She opens her door and dumps garbage under the car! After they left I walked over to see what it was: eight cheese sample packets from Tillamook Creamery! How absolutely thoughtless can people be just dumping whatever they want!! She couldn't wait to find a garbage bin? I considered for a minute going over to the car and asking if she dropped something, but then she'd probably start filming me and posting it on a "Karen Sighting" page. You can't win! I picked the packets up and put them in my garbage bag. People disgust me!

Quiet night. Not as wet as Tillamook, but still damp. The mold is growing....

Oregon Coast! Day Ten!

 

July 16, 2026: It was a quiet night on the side of the one way road called Otter Crest Loop. A nice change from the traffic noise of 101!

I woke up early as usual and around 6am a white van pulls up and parks across the street where the cliff is. Is this the same white van from last night? It's white, but I don't remember details. I watched through the openings in my window covers. OMG! It looks like the same man! He gets out and walks to the cliff looking at the scenery. I really don't know. It's early in the morning, foggy, and truthfully, I was too busy last night waiting for a break in traffic to notice what he looked like other than older, slim, and short white hair. It looks just like him! I watched until he left. If he would have started toward my van, I would have grabbed my chef's knife and he would have been done with. LOL! He left. Later I saw his van at another overlook parking lot. I figured we were both heading north, but I hope not to run into him anywhere for fear of what I might say to him. I'm not into confrontations especially since I hate people on a good day.

The weather is cloudy, cold and drizzly. Well, I didn't want 100 degree temperatures so I can't complain! I drove to Lincoln City, but couldn't find anything to see. Continued to Neskowin where there was supposed to be a "ghost beach". In photos there were pieces of driftwood standing upright. I saw two. Not impressive. Nice beach with an island I walked around. Got to the far side and it's either try to walk on sand-covered wet rocks (TRAUMA RECALL!) or wade through a foot of water. I opted to walk all the way back around.

The beaches are starting to look the same...

Island

Walkway through wet rocks.

Barnacles covering the base of the island.

So even though I was a little disappointed not to see ghosts, the universe rewarded me...with a $20 bill! It was just laying there on the sand. There were people in the distance in every direction. For a moment I considered maybe I should chase them down one by one and ask if they were missing money. That sounds like a stink risk: perfume, detergent, body spray, hair garbage. No. I'll keep it. Then I thought, If I keep it, will that bring bad luck? I don't know where I got this karma retribution worldview. I think if I keep it, I'm just $20 richer!

Then I drove the gorgeous green countryside to McMinnville along highway 130 with single lane bridges all the way. All day I was passing signs for covered bridges, but I didn't stop. I was told by someone I might like to live in this town so I wanted to have a look, but the fields of toxic agriculture surrounding the town and the stench of fertilizer made me turn and run. So I headed to Salem.

Salem was weirdly disorganized. Or maybe that was Google Map's fault? Anywhere I wanted to go I felt disoriented with routes through strange neighborhoods and districts circling through repeating streets. It felt like a neverending maze. It was also very congested which didn't help with Google's directions. "Turn right immediately!" Ah, there are two lanes of bumper to bumper cars HOW am I supposed to get over to the right? 

I went to the Kettle Chip Factory because I read online they give tours. Since I don't eat their potato chips I considered this might be a stupid idea, but since I was there, why not? Well, the guy who answered the high-security door didn't know anything so I left. Why do they need a high-security door on a potato chip factory? Maybe it's not a potato chip factory at all, but some secret government department planning nefarious activities?

I headed west to Tillamook and I hoped the Tillamook Creamery knows they have tours!! I was told by a swimming woman in Coos Bay to stay at the Blue Heron French Cheese Company. They have a huge grassy field that serves as an overnight parking lot where one can stay for five days. FREE! So I followed directions and checked in during business hours to get my pass and the girl at the counter asks me if I'm a member of Harvest Host? No. (Not interested.) She proceeds to tell me I have to be a member in order to stay. Ah, no. Not according to online. I thought, Oh! Not again! Not some silly employee not having any clue what is going on. She tells me the manager will know and calls her over. 

The manager was lovely. Confusing, but lovely. She asked if I was a Harvest Host member. No. She says that's fine, they charge, but we don't. I was so confused by these people, but eventually she said, "Yes, you can stay for free. No need to be a member of Harvest Host." People honestly make me want to scream. Thankfully I can keep the screaming silent and in my head while I continue smiling sweetly. I got my dashboard placard and I am good to go! Hooray! Lots of other nomads, mostly RVs, a few buses, and some vans. Not sure if this is a good idea, but for a day or two I might be able to tolerate parking next to others like sardines.

The blueberry thief showed up and parked in the back. I didn't think I'd see her again since I was making all these side trips. Hopefully I can avoid her so she doesn't throw her dog in my van again or tell me she wants blueberries and hand them off to some man right in front of me.

As you can see from the above photo, it's still cloudy, cold and drizzly. Sometimes in the afternoon it'll clear up, but not today. It's so damp here!

Oregon Coast and Corvallis: Day Nine

July 15, 2026: IT'S THE MIDDLE OF JULY ALREADY!!! Time is flying by!

I walked the Jackson Frazier Wetlands boardwalk in the early morning hours. Drove to the Osborne Pool which is nice, but crowded. They have a dedicated lap pool with six lanes, but three of them the swim team use for practice. Nice dressing rooms, but the showers are closed for remodeling. The lobby didn't smell like chlorine because the indoor pool is also being remodeled. Only the outdoor pool is opened. So only three lap lanes were available and they were filled. I left.

I visited the First Alternative Natural Foods Co-op. OMG! It's wonderful! It's huge compared to most food co-ops which always seems like a desperate afterthought, struggling for relevance in a small town. I threw all caution to the wind, bought a gluten-free PIE and proceeded to eat the whole thing without hesitation. It was a small pie, but.... Banana cream isn't my favorite, but at least I had enough common sense to NOT buy the chocolate cream pie. GLUTEN-FREE! So rare! Still, I did not feel good after eating it!

I interrogated the very friendly cashier about living in Corvallis and she had nothing but good to say. She did say it gets really busy in the fall when students come back for college. I didn't realize it was a college town. She said it might snow once a year and rain during the winter, but not as rainy as Washington. I looked at her and said, "How did you know I was from Washington?" I think she's psychic. I checked Zillow. Housing is EXPENSIVE in Corvallis!!! Way over what I can afford for either sales or renting!

I drove to Avery Park to relax. Nice park, however, although there are signs that say "NO OVERNIGHT PARKING". Odd. I don't think that rule applies to the many homeless living there. In every direction there was a tent or just a bunch of sleeping bags in a pile with people still in them. There was one van parked in the parking lot and clearly it was there all night...or maybe all month. I headed to Newport on the coast. Lovely drive through the countryside with temperatures around 70 degrees.

Newport is very congested. Lots of traffic. It has a wonderful co-op called Oceana Food Co-op. The gardens outside were exquisite. I miss nasturtiums. One of the most unnecessary items I have stored in this van: a jar of nasturtium seeds! I'm hoping someday I'll be able to plant them.

I drove to Moolak Beach which is about ten minutes north of Newport, and braved the incredibly steep trail to the sand (TRAUMA RECALL!). I had to carefully scoot on my butt part of the way as the sand-like gravel was rather slippery. What am I thinking? I couldn't help it. The sand and ocean were beckoning stronger than trauma recall!

Climbing back up the cliff was much easier. Gorgeous views, warm sand, cold water. 

Next went to Yaquina Head Lighthouse and got in FREE with my America the Beautiful Pass. Hooray! I love free and that pass has paid off so many times!

What was spectacular was the beach below made up of rocks that had been polished with the waves! The sound of the surf pulling and rolling rocks was SO RELAXING!  Be sure to listen to the video below all the way to the third (largest) wave as it pulls back and rolls the rocks! I loved it. I could have sat there the rest of the day just listening!

But again, TRAUMA RECALL! I gingerly tiptoed across the rocks steadying each step for stability. (I laughed when I saw this sign. I especially liked "Sneaky" but "Slippery" resonated with me more!)

One nearby woman saw the TRAUMA RECALL all over my face and said, "If you need to grab me go ahead!" She shared with me how her daughter broke an ankle sliding into first base and has had a difficult time recovering. She was afraid of breaking something, too, but there we were being adventurous!

I went back to Newport and parked down by the Vietnam Veterans Memorial and gazed upon the Newport Beach. No beach walking this time. I was pretty tired and the wind was cold in late afternoon.

As I headed to Otter Crest Loop for some overnight parking, I pulled into the Moolak Beach parking lot. As I'm leaving this white van starts to turn right into me! I'm frantically motioning for him to keep going because there is another entrance not fifty feet north and there is no room for him to turn right where I am stopped at the stop sign. Well, he's a man. And true to his dickhead nature, he's impatient, entitled, reckless and hostile on a good day. Our vans missed by inches, but I have no idea how! My window is open. I scream as loud as possible, "YOU DUMB FUCK!" I continued waiting at the stop sign to exit, but I could see him get out of his van and take a photo of the back of my van. WHY? Does he think swearing is illegal and he plans to report me? Or does he plan to turn himself in for reckless, offensive driving and wants to write me a formal apology? More than likely he'll post it somewhere because he's too cowardly to allow me to state my point of view. I really hate people, but men are on the top of my hate list! I hate it when people cause me to ruminate in anger for too long!

Oregon Coast Side Trip: Day Eight

July 14, 2026: I awoke with no trees on top of my van! Hooray for the simple celebrations in life!

I drove to Bend and although Google Maps wanted me to stay on the main highway, I saw a sign for "SCENIC ROUTE" and headed up the Santiam Pass on Highway 242. True to its claim, it was scenic!

The road was smooth as silk, maybe new, no potholes or cracks, like a park road, and the first section was gorgeously, densely wooded. It had plenty of twists and turns and at times was very narrow, but little traffic early in the morning. At the top were lava fields with walls of lava rock on each side of the highway!

At the apex of the mountain was a castle-like observation tower built in the 1930s of these lava rocks. It had these awesome arched windows that framed the various mountains: Three Sisters, Mt. Washington, and Mt. Jefferson with a bronze circular guide to tell you which was which and a rock-carved plaque below each window.

Mt. Washington

Three Sisters

The drive was beautiful especially early in the morning. Well worth the side trip!

I drove through Sisters to Bend. In the morning it was a very pretty town, but later in the afternoon it became congested with tourists. I did errands in Bend. Visited Discount Tires which was not a good experience. I think I'd prefer Les Schwab, but they don't have stores in Arizona!

I attempted to swim at Juniper Pool which is supposedly the best pool in Oregon. It's huge, and the outdoor pool is actually under a removable awning, but the chlorine was so strong I decided against it. (Is it just extra dirty?? Hmmmm....)

I finally found the Old St. Francis "hot springs" but I think it's just a soaking pool and looked more like a beautifully tiled bathtub than a hot springs. Also highly chlorinated. After reading that fact about chlorine, I'll never be the same! By that time the temperatures outside had climbed to 95 degrees so soaking in heat wasn't as appealing. I had an urge to go back to the coolness of the coast!

I stopped just east of Corvallis to park overnight at the Jackson Frazier Wetlands parking lot. It was quite popular with cars in and out going for evening walks or walking their dogs, but once the sunset it became really quiet.

Oregon Coast Side Trip: Day Seven!

July 13, 2026: Overnighting at Blue River Reservoir on this tiny country road was quite possibly the quietest night I've had in Oregon. No traffic all night and the boating parties went home yesterday afternoon. So nice!

In the peace of the morning, I cleaned out the van. I try to do this once a month by emptying out the innards, dusting or washing every surface, and vacuuming the carpets and fabrics. I haven't done it for a while since I avoid doing it if parked on dirt or grass for fear of ticks or other bugs. I don't want any kind of bug infestation. Periodic cleaning deters bugs, mice, and mold. Mold loves dust.

At this time I also go through every tote to see if there is anything I haven't used and garbage it. There are things I am storing for my future home like baking dishes, ceramic containers, bowls, art, lightbulbs and now a bag of hubcaps. I really wish I could find a base so I didn't have to store all this unnecessary stuff in the van which takes up too much space! I ruminated and worried about my mosaics being stored in a woman's garage in Tucson. She said she'll only store them for a year. Well, a year is almost up! Then what do I do? This causes me too much stress and I've almost made some bad decisions buying property just to have some place to put those mosaics!!

Today is a lazy day...

I have a pile of books here in the van. Some of them I get from  the free shelves at libraries and I keep them handy should I come across a little corner neighborhood library. I love those. I stop and look whenever possible and exchange books I've read for new (used) books. This way I don't have to spend money on a book I have no idea if I'd like or not, and I can keep the books as long as I need until I feel like reading.

Today I felt like reading and it's a story about a vampire. I realized too late it's a romance. Eeeewww! I've had this book for maybe a month? I can't remember where I found it maybe in a little town in eastern Oregon? Anyway, I open it and there is a bookmark of Vincent van Gogh with Sunflowers on his jacket! Nice bookmark - double sided which is unusual and clearly higher quality than one without a double side. I love getting gifts from the universe. I feel a little bad that someone might not have realized they left the bookmark in the book when they donated it, but like I said, I cannot remember from which community I found this book and I'm not going to spend $40-$100 in gas to try to return it to its owner. So I'll be thankful and then pay it forward eventually.

I stayed at the Blue River Reservoir again. As I'm laying in bed for the night I hear a loud crack and crash. OMG! I looked outside but didn't see anything except the wall of dirt/cliff across the road. All of a sudden I'm paranoid a tree will fall on my van! I'm not being unreasonable! It could happen. Wouldn't that be a nightmare? Would it push me off the ledge, over the cliff, into the reservoir 100 feet below? Damn, the useless things I worry about!

Oregon Coast: Takin' a Break: Day Six!

 July 12, 2026: Once the highway 101 traffic died down, it was a very quiet night. I woke up at 5am. I love this time of the day. People still sleeping. No traffic. I feel like I have the earth to myself. The photo below is the morning view of the coastline. The clouds and drizzle are finally clearing, but it's time for a break from the gray and damp.

I drove south, back to Florence, and headed east to Eugene on highway 126. Did a bee line to Whole Foods for a shot of civilization. It's so nice when they have a meat/fish counter and I can buy one piece of stuff instead of huge packages that just go bad since I don't eat it fast enough.

Then on to the Amazon Swimming Pool which opens on Sunday at 11:30. It's big, but so darn crowded! There are no reservations so the line outside started around 10:30am. Way too chaotic and noisy with lap swimmers, water walkers, hoards of screaming kids and many lanes of the swim team practicing. I did my 45 minutes and got the hell out of there. But I couldn't smell any chlorine! I recently read the smell of chlorine isn't really the chlorine, but the chlorine mixed with sweat and other human excrements so the stronger the smell, the dirtier the pool. I find that hard to believe. I'm sure chlorine right out of the bottle stinks. I don't know....

I planned to go to Bend, but found a nice pullout on a little road past Blue River Reservoir that goes to the reservoir's official campground.  I washed my Goodwill clothes that still stink (third handwashing) soaking them in Borax. I washed my rims that no longer have hubcabs because one fell off and I won't spend $50 on a hubcab so I took them all off. Washing the rims did not make them look better. Then I ate blueberries and gazed at the view:

It's much warmer here at 80 degrees and the sun is actually out!

Oregon Coast! Day Five!

 July 11, 2026: In the morning I walked a lap around the dog park then through the town of Reedsport. I left early on Highway 35 to an organic blueberry farm (Estill Farms) for some u-picking!! Google Maps took me to who knows where and I parked under their sign and tried to call but no one answered or returned my call. Then on the way back I found the blueberry farm. HUGE blueberries covering the bushes! Easy to pick, and oh, they were so tasty! I babbled the ear off of the woman in the row next to me. Her name was Yvonne and she grew flowers. I intended to pick about a half of a bucket, but I was talking so much I wasn't paying attention. I picked 10 pounds! At $3.50 per pound (for organic berries!!) that was $35!! Thankfully they fit in my refrigerator!

I then headed to Florence to a very, very busy laundromat, but the only one in town with top loaders. The parking lot was filled including three vans and two campers. They had seven top loaders and five were broken! The incredibly nice laundry lady said it's really difficult to get parts for the older machines. So that explains why so many in other laundromats are broken!

I met another van woman doing her laundry. It was fun to talk to someone else living in a van. However, I'm not sure why van women think I want their dogs in my van. They always walk right up and either throw the dog in my van or let it jump in. Would it be fine with them if I jumped into their vans uninvited? 

Earlier I offered her some of my blueberries and she said, "Yes." Not five seconds after I gave her a baggie of blueberries she asked me if it would be OK if she gave them to some man...???!!! WHAT???!!! I was livid! So incredibly RUDE. Why not just wait until I leave and give them to him? Why take them if she didn't want them? Why would she think my gift to her was to be given to someone else right in front of me? Why not wait until I'm gone and the do it? Just the question was rude. The guy loudly thanked her for the blueberries and I loudly said, "YOUR WELCOME" back. I've never met another woman living in a van who wasn't absolutely obnoxious, self-centered, condescending or just rude in some way. Probably from spending so much time alone? I wonder if I'm as socially inept?

I drove around Florence, walked to the market, then headed north along highway 101. I stopped at Bob's Creek beach. I walked on the beach and attempted to walk on rocks with pools of sea water, but it brought on TRAUMA RECALL...it felt too slippery. I had my high top hiking boots on which makes me feel secure, but...

Then I drove just south of Yachats to Thor's Well which is a collapsed cave that spurts water with the waves. The hike was only .4 miles on a paved walkway which is good since my ankle, knee and leg have been hurting. The weather was cloudy and drizzly. The walkways were wet. TRAUMA RECALL!! as I very carefully tiptoed down the path making sure I wouldn't slip.

I briefly watched as they carried someone out on a gurney and again, TRAUMA RECALL! I wonder if the person broke their ankle? Eeeewww! Beaches will never be the relaxing experience they once were!

I spent the rest of the day eating blueberries. I parked on a pullout on highway 101, but I really need to stop parking on the highway. It's so noisy with all the traffic. Unfortunately, I really don't want to drive on a dusty, dirt road up into the middle of no where to camp either. I think I'm tired of the gray, cloudy, drizzly days and noisy highway. Tomorrow I'll drive east.