The LAST of the Summer Projects, or Self-Reliance Overtime.

And the award for most summer accomplishments goes to...

Air vent in roof
Closet walls lined
Fence gate post replaced
Two loads of bark for garden
Rodent control and pinwheel construction
Bleach and scrub garage
Side of house painted
Whole garden weeding

Oddly enough, as I read that meager list it really doesn't look like much especially if one doesn't take into account the energy and strength one must have for some of the construction projects. And toxicity. Let's not forget toxicity. Still, I'm patting myself on the back because I can't believe I didn't collapse after the first couple endeavors.

Of course, I've been adding projects, too. I painted the dormer roof walls. I had planned to save those for next year, but they looked so small I thought Why not?

It was absolutely NO FUN to precariously balance myself on that tiny roof ledge and pray I wouldn't topple over with a serious case of vertigo. A couple times I almost did.

Or lay along the roof and try to reach up into the corner! For such a small area, it sure was filled with challenge, BUT it's done! The only thing left to paint on the house are those fascia board trim (see above photo...looks like crap) but those will wait until next year along with the garage.

My next and last project which is another one I added to the list was to re-aluminum seal the dormer roof. I was going to wait until next year but when I started dancing on the upper roofs to paint the dormer walls, I noticed the flat roofs have tiny, hairline cracks. I don't want to wait.

This was HELL. Literally. Burning fires of hell. I washed the roof, but when the hazy ash blew in from local forest fires, I was afraid after a week the roof was too dirty again and the aluminum would peel. So I washed it again. Then the nights started getting cold and it didn't seem like it was dry enough. Finally, yesterday afternoon the roofs were dry and clean all at the same time so like a fool in 90 degree heat in the middle of the afternoon I jumped in (or rather, UP) and went to work.

Half way through the top, larger roof I was honestly afraid I would suffer heat exhaustion! I kept taking breaks and splashing water on my skin and drinking cold water. I couldn't remember what kind of roller I used in the past and the ignorant hardware sales boy sold me a thick one...WRONG...it splattered aluminum silver all over. I was covered in smelly, petro-based aluminum. I ended up having to throw away the pants, the shoes, and the socks I was wearing. All that dripping and splattering ended up being tracked on my floors. What a mess!

And I don't think I should have done it in such hot heat. The directions say don't apply it in temperatures exceeding 110 degrees...OK...I noticed when I'd roll it, it seemed to dry too fast and harden making thin, even rolling impossible. Still, it's done. I hope it's good enough and it doesn't start peeling. It's not there to look good, just protect the roof.

Paint dormer sides
Re-seal aluminum coating on roof
Scrub kitchen, bathroom, laundry room, pantry tile floors

FINISHED!! That's it! Everything else I want to do should be much more fun!

HOORAY!!

Constant Self-Reliance

You might be wondering why does she keep writing posts about mundane home improvement projects? I'll tell you why:

1.) This is summer entertainment. Yeah, I think most chemically sensitive people might find something better to do, but for lack of fragrance-free opportunities and fragrance-free friends, this is it for me!

2.) I love being productive and saving money at the same time.

3.) The older I get the less I'll be able to do these kinds of things. I want a record so some day I can look back and say, Jeez, I was so energetic...young...self-reliant!

It was my number one goal this summer to paint the LAST outside wall of my house. Last summer I actually did three walls and my whole body was in excruciating pain for at least four months.

Before I start painting I never really notice how badly it needs to be done. Once I start and can compare the before and after sides, it's really obvious! Of course, the white primer spots make it look twice as bad!

NEW.........................OLD

This side doesn't get the hot sun for most of the day so I was hoping it would be easier in terms of preparation. No such luck. The previous paint job was sprayed and the painters sprayed right over spider nests, left glitches all over the trim, didn't take the time to control drips, and some of the paint is so thin the old color shows through. I kept seeing specks of beige wondering if something was growing on the paint, but it's just the old color not quite covered. This is why I have little desire to hire professionals who are rarely professional here. No one has integrity. They want the most money for the least amount of work.

It was also difficult because of this overhang blocking access. It was really, really scary to perch up on that tiny three foot roof while I painted which is why I put off this summer job for so long! And of course, when I did have this roof done ten years ago I didn't bother to get up there and check the job...such crappy work they did on the flashing leaving nails exposed! I'm not sure if I would have even known it was poorly done back then. I've learn so much over the years usually the hard way.

It was also difficult because of the garden below which is wider than the other gardens so getting stable footing for the ladder was a challenge. The camellia bush blocked a section so I cut it back a lot. I was really tempted to cut the whole thing down a few times just to get it out of the way. The garden is pretty trashed from walking through it. Oh well! It'll come back.

And then there is the sweating. Now that I'm guzzling water all day long, I sweat like a pig. I don't remember sweating profusely last year with water literally dripping off my body, in my eyes, making my mask wet, rolling down my arms and legs, and making my protective glasses fog. Blah. It just adds to the discomfort.

Hooray for the biggest project checked off my summer list!

I still have the dormers, some of the trim, and the garage to paint. These things may have to wait until next year.

I'm exhausted. But so proud! And self-reliant!

Bad Construction Karma = Me

Saint Barbara

I've come to accept my bad construction karma. It's just the way it is. Any project will cost me twice the amount of money as any other customer and there is something about me that makes men want to rip me off.  I have addressed most of my construction issues in my former post from July 2012 entitled, "I'd Rather Smell Like a Man."


I just need to process my latest bad experience now.


Why I have to hire construction workers:

1.)  I own a house. I'm seriously wondering why this is a good idea. I know with owning my own home I don't have to deal with stinky, stupid landlords and I have control over what happens, but at the same time, I never had to deal with construction before so I am now questioning if owning my own house is safer than renting? It's nonstop. Relentless. Get one thing done and another problem rears its ugly head demanding to be fixed. So is home ownership worth it? Wouldn't it be safer, less expensive, less stressful, and less toxic to rent and not be responsible for maintenance?

2.) If I just let the repairs go, my house will fall apart creating twice the problems which may also contribute to air space contamination and health issues.

3.) For a woman, I think I'm pretty strong, but I'm not as strong as a construction worker so it takes me twice as long to complete a project. If at all! Some things I cannot do because I can't lift it or move it. I watch men handle drills with one hand and drill a screw in seconds. It takes me holding the tool with two hands and using all my weight to push and often I STILL can't get the damn screw in the wood!

4.) I'm usually not as skilled or knowledgeable as a construction worker so I screw up more often so it takes me twice as long and twice as much money to complete a project.

5.) The chemicals they use for whatever they are doing are toxic and make me ill. Since they can usually complete a job in half the time, I'd rather they breathe the fumes instead of me.

6.) I don't have most of the tools and they are too expensive to buy or rent. Even the ones I could rent, many of them are too heavy to lift or move, let alone handle them!

7.) I want things fixed or improved to make my life easier and more enjoyable.

8.) I don't always have the energy or stamina to do physical labor, especially big projects.



The problem with hiring construction workers:

1.) Most of them stink of chemicals. Even if they say they don't, they do.

2.) Most of them are unprofessional, untrustworthy, and incompetent sleazeballs.

3.) Their sleaziness often costs me twice the money.

4.) Their incompetence costs me twice the time.

5.) The whole experience is more often than not very stressful.

5.) I can't concentrate when they are here working so this is a huge imposition on my time affecting my income.


Obviously my very good construction experience was followed by a very bad one and I am processing. Processing helps me not to seek revenge, and therefore, put myself in the line of fire. I've been shopping for a gun. Well, to clarify, this latest construction worker was a master manipulator and come to find out, a convicted felon. I was warned by the police not to mess with him. Great. I'm trying very hard to fly low and avoid being a target, but I'd really rather rip this smug, condescending, arrogant, ignorant slimeball a new asshole and report him to the powers than be. The Labor and Industries representative said if I report him for ruining my roof eaves with a lousy paint job they will fine him $1,000 for every address I can provide because he isn't a licensed contractor. I know of four addresses he's worked at. I can find more in this little town. Every time I see his truck out in front of a neighbor's house I wonder if he's pretended to know what he's doing with them, too. Yeah, I know. Out of all the people I hired or got quotes from this summer, he's the only one whose license I thought I checked but didn't. Damn. I've been bad mouthing his name all over town. If he shows up at my house unhappy with my anti-recommendations, I want to be armed. Besides, I'm American. Guns R Us.

But a gun isn't going to help me if he chooses to seek the ultimate revenge. What would the ultimate revenge be? What am I most afraid of? Perfume. Cologne. My greatest fear is if he completely understood the ramifications of perfume exposure and throws perfume on me or on my property. I find that so strange that is my greatest fear. Let him beat the crap out of me or shoot me with a gun, but perfume exposure scares the bejeebies out of me. I'm sure this is totally incomprehensible to the average, non-chemically sensitive. I'm hoping as sleazy as he is, he's also not real smart and he didn't register or understand the seriousness of my fragrance-free requests. One of his workers smelled like a toxic waste dump and I told him to get off my property.


So what to do? Continue to lay low or demand my money back and deal with whatever repercussions come flying my way?


I decided I needed some kind of divine intervention so I checked online to find out who is the patron saint of construction. Saint Barbara.

BARBARA?

BARBARA?

Wow.  I should have known. Barbara was the name of my evil babysitter. Barbara was the name of that ugly doll I hated and gave to my little brother in hopes he would tear her head off. (I named her after my evil babysitter.)  Barbara was the name of my wicked stepmother. I have bad Barbara karma, too.

I am so DOOMED...