Van Life Has Changed Me...

Van life is challenging on a good day, although I can say now after three months it's getting better. I often wonder how it will affect my life in general. Will it be a positive influence overall or will it be one big regret? Will I eventually have nightmares and nightly ruminations about van dwelling much like I have been tormented about past jobs for most of my life? 

A friend of mine recently pondered about aging and as people get older they tend to migrate toward conservative, conventional thinking and become narrow minded, stuck in their ways while lacking in flexibility and opened-minds. I pondered back, maybe as we age we become wise, knowing what we like and what we don't? I think about this and wonder how van life will change me and how it already has. Here are some of the ways I feel I have changed from this experience in just three months (I may add to the list later):

10.) Buying in Bulk No More! I used to buy in bulk to get the best deals: cases of toilet paper and paper towels, packages of toothbrushes, etc. I still shop like that if I see a sale I want multiples. There is absolutely no extra room in a van. This forces me to rethink my spending habits and hopefully adjust my mindset. I still have three gallons of Ecos laundry detergent in my van. Eventually it'll get used freeing up more space, but now that each gallon is up to $30 (I bought them for $8 each!), they stay.

9.) I've become a non-toxic laundromat assessment expert. That is my new title. Impressive, eh? Prior to living in a van, I think I might have entered a laundromat twice in my life. I now know if the laundromat doesn't have top loading washers, don't even bother as other machines are too toxic to use since the detergent trays harbor the stink of Gain and other nasty poisons. They cannot be cleaned enough to be safe. I know this. I've tried. I'm thinking if van life ever ends I'll start a non-toxic laundromat business. There is definitely a need.

8.) I'm masquerading as a dog lover. To be clear, I don't hate dogs. I hate bad dog owners. My motto, "No such thing as a bad dog only bad dog owners." A majority of van dwellers have dogs: barking dogs, roaming dogs, shitting dogs, howling dogs, smelling dogs. There is no benefit to look like you hate the people you are camped next to and looking like you hate their dog is way worse. So I am friendly as fuck. I know all the dogs' names. I call them over to me. I snuggle and give them love. Recently, I house sat for some friends. Their son lives on the property and has FIVE barking dogs. FIVE!!?? My personal hell. But those dogs came up to the front door every morning and I dutifully went outside to greet them, talked baby talk, and gave them pets. I'm convinced I am possessed by some dog demon. Who would have ever thought?

7.) No-preparation food. I currently do not have a refrigerator, however, this is soon to be remedied. For many reasons, I now prefer no-cook, no-clean up meals. Cooking is a major endeavor that entails hauling out all the equipment from the back of the van, setting up, actual cooking, then clean up that utilizes a minimum of a gallon of water. Water is precious in van life. Bottom line, food preparation is a messy harassment. It's exhausting. My old rug is evidence sporting unsightly stains, general discoloration, and burn marks. I now avoid cooking inside the van, but bad weather sometimes requires it. My diet restricts processed food, restaurant food, leftovers, besides the long list of banned products which makes feeding myself a challenge anyway, but sometimes when the weather is bad or I'm just tired, I throw all caution to the wind and opt for a restaurant meal, or any non-cookable food out of the grocery store. After a lifetime of daily and elaborate healthy food preparation, this is so different!!

Before the rug was stained and burned...see it in the background?

6.) Exercise. I exercise now more than I ever have in my life! My Bluetti weighs 60 lbs and for a while before I acquired solar power, I used to have to lug it to the side or back of the van to charge it. I'm constantly crawling under the bed looking for things or curling up to fit into tight spaces. I am up and down the side steps, climbing my telescopic ladder to wash solar panels or the van, hoisting myself into the front seat, or catapulting myself into bed which is much like the bunk beds I had when I was a kid only without a ladder. I carry heavy glass jugs of water, move supplies, reorganize totes, crawl under the van, and transfer gallons of water to buckets. Today I lifted and transported a 40 lb. bag of pine pellets from the hardware store to my van. This is not uncommon and it's never-ending. Never mind the constant reorganization of my storage unit and I still try to walk everyday. I constantly think, I am way too old for these acrobats and deep knee bends (let alone any bends!). I worry about overexertion which will trigger autoimmune attacks, but it is what it is. I am feeling fine. My muscles are stronger, I haven't pulled anything out of place, and my stamina is increasing. 

5.) I'm working on a laptop after a lifetime of working on only a desktop. I swear a lot. It tends to do what it wants when it wants, and I'm constantly having to stop and correct the problems. It's a much slower process. Besides the screen is so damn small.

4.) Starfucks. I don't have internet in my van (yet) so I am required to find it out in the wild. Starfucks is one of those places. They used to allow people to walk in without buying anything to use their stores and bathrooms which I think is very good customer service. I could sit there all day and work for free which is outstanding marketing. This is a company that makes millions in profits overcharging people for drinks that might cost them 25 cents in supplies. I would think they can afford to allow people to use their facilities because a majority of their addicted caffeine-fiends will buy their overpriced products anyway to cover for the rest of us.

4:30am...the best time to visit. So quiet!

Unfortunately, the company decided they needed more money and imposed a purchasing "entrance fee" in order to sit in their store and use their bathroom. I don't drink caffeine or sugar, but I started buying a small cup of plain coffee if anything to avoid the stink eye of the counter peons. One of those peons yelled at me one morning, "IT'S NOT SMALL, IT'S TALL!" Oh, marketing bullshit. What a waste of $2.71. (Do the math times 30 that is how much it costs a month to use their internet almost more expensive than actual internet service!) A couple times I gave the cup of coffee to a homeless guy begging at the counter or someone sitting without a drink (oh! horrors!). Then I switched to a small (TALL!) glass of apple juice that within an hour would knock me on my butt from the sugar. I finally switched to water. $3.20 for a small (TALL!) bottle of water! What a rip! But at least I can use it and because I've started buying water every morning, the peons no longer glare at me.  I never used to patronize Starfucks. My favorite location claims to be the largest in the country. I find a corner to hide in and at 4:30am, there are few people in the store. They play good music. A few hours later when it starts getting crowded from all those caffeine-fiends needing their fix, I leave. It works for now. I look forward to getting internet in my van....

3.) I have become a plastic hoarder! I never used to buy plastic Ziplock bags. Plastic destroys the environment and pollutes the oceans. I am now addicted. Everything I own in the van is plasticized in a freezer bag. I buy them in different sizes. They keep everything contained and dry. Ziplock is the best brand. I also hoard plastic grocery bags and use them for a variety of bigger things that don't fit in a Ziplock such as document containment, garbage, and poop. They don't work well for urine as most are not water-tight, but when one needs to poop, using two bags, plus a Ziplock, plus a third bag works well. Sometimes I will go into a store, buy five items and  come out with each item in a plastic bag. Other times I just grab a handful as I'm ready to leave. I worry one day Walmart security will stop me and accuse me of theft. Although most stores utilize the thin, lightweight plastic bags, some stores have really thick, heavier plastic grocery bags. However, all plastic grocery bags are sturdy enough for carrying heavy groceries and are so handy for a variety of needs when living in a van.

2.) Walmart-ness. I boycotted Walmart for years, especially during the Bush and Dump presidencies because Walmart supports the Republican Party. I find in a van I'm less concerned about politics and truthfully, I just don't give a damn what a bunch of rich people who have overthrown the country do with their time. There is nothing I can control, nothing I can change, so why should I stress over this? Now I shop at Walmart everyday. This is the store with the cheapest water refills. They also sell high priced bathroom bags for camping, those Ziplocks I'm addicted to, vinegar, ammonia, and yogurt all at a cheaper price than other stores. I don't buy food at Walmart. I'm not that crazy, but they do have some gluten-free and organic products. Walmart is everywhere so I always have a place to get supplies and I'm usually shopping at 6am when there are no lines. Most Walmarts allow vans to park in their parking lots overnight. I have never done this, but if in a pinch late at night needing a place to stay, that's where I know I can go. As a van dweller, Walmart is now my friend.

1.) One of my greatest pet peeves are people who wear pajamas in public, usually flannel, printed pajama bottoms, but I have also seen a full set of pink printed outfits with matching bunny slippers walking right down the street. I've always considered these people failing miserable at fashion and just plain lazy. GET DRESSED, PEOPLE! I am now thinking maybe all this time I have missed the point!? Maybe pajama-wearing people are the free thinkers? Those not concerned about what others think? Only caring about being exceptionally comfortable? Are they the hippies of our current day and age? I am considering as a van dweller, I should be wearing pajamas!! I love my pajamas and it's not like I get to wear them "around the house" anymore! This thinking is SO RADICAL! I have not yet gone to the lingerie-wearing dark side although yesterday I was modeling my brightly striped pajama bottoms while I was sealing up holes in the bottom of the van only because they are old and I figured if I got oil and dirt all over them, it wouldn't matter. I had a visitor!! Did I flinch or run to hide? Nope. I proudly wore my PJ pants in public. I think about it all the time and I'm close to becoming a full-time free spirit. Soon....Maybe.

I think I've become a person that just doesn't give a rat's ass about things that used to bother me, less anal retentive and compulsive, less judgmental, and less stuck in my ways? I have become an ultra free thinker and doer! I think van life might be contradicting the ill effects of aging!!

Building the Probiotic Arsenal

I made a trip to the big city today for a visit to a doctor I went to years ago. I really liked her back then except she loaded me up with pills and the side effects made me wish I would just die. I got frustrated, ran out of money, and stopped going to her. The eight hour round trip with traffic jams also discouraged future visits. However, I am so incredibly disgusted with the doctors who are closer to me I thought I'd suffer the drive and go back to this doctor. I told her I was the "prodigal patient". LOL I did NOT admit I am also the "reluctant patient".

She was wonderful. Knowledgeable, articulate, pleasant, conversational and had LOTS of ideas. We also had a long discussion regarding my intolerance to pills and she very respectfully acknowledged my issues. It's so nice to have someone who listens.

First step: probiotics. Nothing will work without good digestion and she suggested the fermented foods I have been reading about for quite sometime: kimchi and kombucha. These bizarre probiotics are difficult to get anywhere in my neck of the woods, but they are plentiful in the big city. So I headed to Whole Foods after the appointment and loaded up on kimchi and kombucha. I already have sauerkraut at home and I forgot to buy artichoke hearts which are supposed to help with digestion. Oh, yeah, and I bought dandelion greens and some other weird bitter to help with fat digestion but I don't remember the name. Neither of the greens taste good. They are bitter. Maybe that's why they are called "bitters." Duh.

 

The kombucha is really interesting. It's tangy, carbonated, and one of the bottles is ginger flavored. It's a little like drinking carbonated soda...only it's healthy! I can't quite get used to the idea something that tastes so decadent is actually really good for your digestion.

UPDATE: Can you believe I'm still eating/drinking things without researching them first? When will I learn? Kombucha is made with black or green tea. CAFFEINE! First, no wonder I thought it tasted so good and second, yes it was too decadent to be good for me. I can't go near caffeine. I didn't seem to have a reaction but I was only sipping a little each day. Supposedly it has less than regular tea, but with my sensitivities it would be best if I avoided it. Also, due to the fermentation, it's considered an alcohol...so strange to have an upper and a downer all in one drink? Maybe they cancel each other out? Yeah, I knew this was too good to be true! I have found if I drink more than a few sips over more than one day I become irrationally depressed. Caffeine is evil.

The first time I tried the kimchi I didn't think I'd like it. It was really hot with peppers so at first I thought maybe I'll just do it a little spoon at a time. But ten minutes later I was CRAVING more. That is always a good sign that my body wants it. I try to listen to my body.  I love it on top of food like hamburger or fish.

Here's to being on a new path for improved health!

Wish me luck!

Green Tea

I'm constantly researching for solutions to my health issues as improving my health is a requirement if I want to live a joyful life full of energy. The inflammation that resurfaced while taking thyroid medications hasn't gone away. I recently read green tea can be an anti-inflammatory for anyone who is TH-1 dominant. Due to my sensitivity to caffeine I have always been leery of green tea. Yeah, I have experienced the anti-inflammatory benefits of chocolate, but it's never worth the risk of all the other side effects: nausea, mood swings, headaches, insomnia, cognitive impairment as if I've been drugged, violent shaking of every nerve in my body, and general malaise that lasts for days after consumption.

I recently read a post by a woman who said she had an "allergy" to caffeine. I'm not sure it's an actual immunoglobin response allergy rather than an intolerance or sensitivity, but I was intrigued. So I went searching and found an article called, "How Much Mental Illness is an Allergy to Caffeine?" Fascinating. I guess I'm not the only one who experiences violent reactions to this evil. You can read it HERE.

Many say green tea, although caffeinated, is different from coffee or black tea. It's hard to ignore the list of benefits:

Weight loss. Oh! Excellent! Lack of thyroid hormone slows one's metabolism resulting in weight gain. This is a constant complaint I hear from anyone who has Hashimoto's or hypothyroidism in general. Some of the thyroid medications even contribute to weight gain. Losing weight is difficult if not impossible for many. Green tea speeds up metabolism, mobilizing fatty acids creating fat loss and feelings of energy. Hooray!

Cell damage prevention. Green tea has the antioxidant catechin which reduces free radicals in the body. This helps prevent cell damage.

Cardiovascular disease prevention. Green tea improves circulation and lowers cholesterol lowering one's risk to heart-related diseases.

Blood sugar stabilization. Green tea stabilizes blood sugar which lowers one's risk of diabetes. It also helps with insulin resistance a common issue with Hashimoto's.

Cancer prevention. Green tea destroys cancer cells lowering one's risk for cancer.

Brain function. Green tea energizes the brain which improves cognitive function. This lowers one's risk of neurodegenerative diseases such as Alzheimer's and Parkinson's.

Anxiety relief. Green tea has a calming effect due to the amino acid L-theanine. Since discovering I have a gene mutation that makes me prone to worry and anxiety, I've been on the look out for something that might help. I'm tired of being a worry wart.

Energy. Green tea has caffeine so it is advised not to drink it before bedtime, however, because of the theanine it has a synergetic effect which eliminates the "wired" feeling normally associated with caffeine. This balance between energy and calm makes it tolerable for many who are sensitive to caffeine.

Adrenal fatigue. Although it is suggested not to drink or eat caffeine if one has adrenal health issues, this is the exception. Green tea is considered a nutritional support for adrenals.

Death. Green tea reduces one's risk of death. Yep, that's what I read! Considering the benefits listed above, it certainly sounds like a miracle cure for any number of life-threatening conditions. Realistically, we are all going to die, but a product claiming to promote good health and extend life? Sounds good to me.

 

Let the games begin! I decided nothing ventured, nothing gained. Practicing my resolution to be brave. Slowly. I was worried (I can't help it! It's in my DNA!), but at the same time cautiously optimistic. Or irrationally hopeful. Unrealistically desperate. I bought one tea bag. Someone warned I might not like the taste as it has a strong "plant" taste...like dirt or composted weeds. I was prepared for the worst, but found it to taste like real, black tea. I haven't had black tea in years so it felt like a naughty treat! I started with four sips. Within minutes I felt energetic and found myself talking non-stop to a friend as if I were wired. BUT it wasn't a wired feeling and I didn't start shaking uncontrollably. I felt awake probably for the first time in a long time. No headaches or nausea, and I didn't experience any unusual insomnia that night.

I tried it again the next day, only four sips. I worried about the slight headache I had an hour later, but my irrational hopefulness made me believe it was because I waited too long to eat lunch. An hour after I ate, I drank some more tea, and another headache ensued. This one tormented me the rest of the day and all night causing nausea and general discomfort. Oops.

I usually experience a secondary, delayed reaction to caffeine so it wasn't too surprising when I awoke the second day with another headache and spinal pain. I've heard there is a decaffeinated green tea, but I'm so sensitive any amount of caffeine residue would give me grief.

Green tea is not for me. Oh well!

Caffeine AND Cancer in ONE!

I'd be disappointed if the corporate world didn't take advantage of cancer awareness month to market yet another toxic product:

 

 

PINK LEMONADE 5-HOUR ENERGY!!!



 

 

PROCEEDS TO BENEFIT CANCER!!!

You can eat this toxic caffeine additive AND support cancer at the same time! Caffeine and cancer, my two favorite subjects. How timely. How predictable. How hypocritical.

Drinking Coffee Will Make You Blind

Blindness was always a threat if you were doing something really sinful, like masturbating. Drinking coffee is evil as it is linked to all kinds of health issues. Try telling that to a coffee addict. If they are experiencing a bit of withdrawal, talk fast and run faster. Caffeine fiends don't like it when you threaten their addictions.



I just read this article, "Popular Drink Linked to Vision Loss" and it made me once again thankful I don't drink coffee. It says if you drink up to three cups a day, you could be at risk for blindness! Whoa! That's a lot of people going blind. I wonder if Starbucks is aware of these studies? Would they care?

Maybe this is why I have superhero vision, comparatively speaking?

The patron saint of coffee drinkers is Saint Drogo. I vote they oust him and use Saint Lucy, the patron saint of vision, for divine guidance here. She could have a cup of coffee sitting on the platter along side her eyeballs.

Here is the article for those who want more information other than my sarcasm...

http://health.yahoo.net/experts/dayinhealth/coffee-linked-vision-loss

For more of my opinions on coffee see my post entitled, "Coffee and Caffeine Addictions: Brad Pitt is a Coke Head".

Coffee and Caffeine Addictions: Brad Pitt is a Coke Head

Recently I read Brad Pitt gets his six kids out of bed by tempting them with Coke. I was really disappointed. For some reason I thought if you are willing to have six kids, most of them adopted, be constantly in the spotlight with your parenting skills being scrutinized daily by the media, you'd at least TRY be a good parent. Or TRY not to brag about your stupidity to the press. He struck me as smarter than the average air-head actor. I am blinded by his beauty, I guess. There really needs to be licensing requirements to have kids. He drugs his kids to get them moving. I wonder how they will function as they get older? I know this type of parenting stupidity is normal with people feeding their children all kinds of sugar/caffeine junk food in the morning, but I question what kinds of health issues develop if one starts drinking caffeine as a child? Is Coke a childhood precursor to Mountain Dew? Mountain Dew to coffee? Coffee to Five Hour Energy? When does the addiction escalation end?

I've been lucky. My mother didn't allow her children caffeinated drinks. She clearly recognized caffeine-induced hyperactivity could be a health issue for tiny, developing bodies. THANK YOU, MOM! She, on the other hand, was a coffee fiend. Non-stop drinking. I was about seven years old when I begged her for a taste. I assumed it must be wonderful since she drank it all the time. And it was forbidden. I had to have just one sip.  Icky, icky, icky! "Why, mom, why?"  I was told it's an acquired taste. Not for me.  I've never drank even one cup in my life and have even spit out desserts made with coffee. Yes, I've been very lucky! As bad as chocolate and diet soft drinks have been for me, I can't imagine what a coffee addiction would do to my system.

I've given my caffeine theory to many a coffee drinker. It's like asking heroin addicts to give up heroin. I've had people nearly run me over while I'm walking trying to get to the nearest espresso stand. How many of you have seen coffee fights on the freeway? People jacked up on caffeine are a danger to society. Is it any wonder we have a depression epidemic in this country with a Starbucks on nearly every corner? And a coffee addict who needs a fix? You've seen them nervous, shaking, and pacing like a caged animal ready to bite off your head. Anyone who tells me they can't function throughout the day without coffee, is clearly in need of intervention. It's worse than a chocolate addiction.

Caffeine is also secretly hidden in some health supplements and pain relievers. Energy is a sneaky little sales gimmick.

Were you allowed to drink coffee as a child? Soft drinks?

Why did you start drinking caffeine?

Do you think caffeine affects your health?

How would your life change if you gave it up?