Spicy Turkey Cabbage Wraps (recipe)

I've been reading Amy Myers' books The Autoimmune Solution and The Thyroid Connection. Both good basic books on their respective subjects. Her "Myers Way" diet and lifestyle is very similar to Kharrazian's protocol except she allows sweet potatoes, shellfish, pork and all fruits.  And CHOCOLATE!!! She obviously didn't get the memo chocolate is a gluten cross-reactor. For anyone with weakened willpower for chocolate this could provide a justification for some bad behavior, but not me! Instead, I just lost all faith in her. Still, the books serve as refreshers on how to eat and how to live with an autoimmune disease, and specifically Hashimoto's Thyroiditis. For anyone newly diagnosed, this would be a life saver or at least set them on the right track.

Dr. Myers talks a lot about the failure of conventional medicine and gives all kinds of examples including her own personal story with Graves Disease and hyperthyroidism. Given only drastic options: poison, radiate, or surgically remove her thyroid, and desperate for relief with no other remedies in sight, she had her thyroid surgically removed. It is an atrocity how these conventional doctors are so eager to cut body parts out of us because they are too stupid or lazy to come up with better solutions. Having had my own close call with a butcher recently, I shiver at the thought.

Although I think both of these books are very good resources for newbies, I found them excessively repetitive. Every point she makes she repeats in every chapter, many times. One of the books I listened to it on tape in my car so perhaps this made the repeats more obvious. I kept yelling at the speakers, "YOU ALREADY SAID THAT A MILLION TIMES!" I fought the urge to fast forward with every repetition hoping I'd find new information but knowing I might miss it with each jump. I think if one were to remove all the repetition it would boil down to a very short book. And, she is a pill pusher. For every symptom, she has a corresponding drug that she promotes. Although she's all about removing toxins, she's failed to read the ingredients on her supplement bottles. She also doesn't address when her patients can't take drugs as so few profit-seeking doctors do.

BUT both books she has a whole chapter on recipes that comply with her diet regiment. Since I have recently added ground turkey and cabbage to my diet this one caught my eye. turkey is high in selenium which is a good, supportive nutrient. I've added my tweaks and notes in the recipe instructions below.

Spicy Turkey Cabbage Wraps

Ingredients:
8 intact cabbage leaves
1 tablespoon coconut oil
1-2 garlic cloves, minced
1 teaspoon ginger root, minced
1 yellow onion, diced
10 stalks of asparagus
1/2 lb. ground turkey
1/8 teaspoon turmeric
juice of one large orange wedge (about 2 tablespoons)
juice of 1/2 lime
1 tablespoon chopped fresh basil
1 tablespoon chopped scallions

Fill a large pot half way with water, heat to boil.

In a large skillet, heat oil, saute garlic, ginger, and onion. Add asparagus and cook a few minutes. (I chopped the stalks into one inch pieces. I suppose I didn't have to do this and it might have been better in a wrap with long stalks, but I liked it better.) Add turkey, turmeric, and juice. When almost cooked completely, add basil and scallions. Cook until done.

When water in pot boils, add a few cabbage leaves at a time using tongs. I think to fill eight leaves it would spread the mix thin or make very small wraps. I'd be more inclined to use four and have more filling so it would suffice as a meal. Remove after 30 seconds I left in about 1 minute only because they didn't seem soft enough to roll. Fill with turkey mix, roll, serve. As the rolls sit, the leaves form around each other so they stay together making it somewhat easy to lift and eat.

She said it has a nice flavor and with those ingredients, I had high hopes. Maybe I've been eating too many herbs and spices, but it didn't seem to have much of a flavor at all. It wasn't bad. I think turkey is a bit flavorless anyway. The cabbage roll was messy even though it did stay together. I preferred eating the turkey mix without the cabbage roll, but I think I will experiment and place slices of cabbage IN the mix.

Genetics...You are So Screwed.

Most of my family are stinkers and don't give a rat's ass if their bad habits are poisonous to me so I avoid relatives when possible. My brother just recently quit smoking so his toxicity has decreased. I wait for a nice day so I don't have to sit inside his newly constructed [formaldehyde smelling] house and in the fresh and tolerably warm-ish air I am able to catch up on gossip and family news.

My niece was unexpectedly present. She's a stinker. Her long hair freshly washed in god-awful scented shampoo is enough to kill me...besides the make-up, lotion, deodorant, and scented candle fetish. And cats. She's a cat woman.

A few years ago she was diagnosed with Crohn's Disease so I was eager to discuss autoimmune diseases with her. I shared with her my Hashimoto's Thyroiditis diagnosis. She complained her doctors know nothing. (At times she so very much like me in odd ways it's frightening!) However, when I asked her if she had read any books or websites on autoimmunity. She hadn't. I attempted to ask her about her diet, but she became defensive stating her diet is fine although she still ends up in the hospital. She complained about being tired all the time, but she confessed she eats a lot of sugar. She told me stress is a trigger for her and asked me if I knew that. Yes, I did. She looked at her father and said, "SEE! I'm not making it up!"

We continued chatting and she wanted to know about my genes because she might have the same. She wants to get her DNA tested and I shared that I had mine tested. This made her very excited and she wanted to know our ancestry, but specifically the genes I have that are associated with health and disease. I told her I couldn't remember specifics and our DNA won't be exactly the same, but when I get home I'd email her. She kept bouncing between docile and attentive vs. loud, defensive, and high strung. I wondered if this was a symptom of something. (Too many toxins?? Too much sugar??)

I have many, many times in the past tried to educate her about chemical sensitivity, but like so many unenlightened, she's not interested. It's not personally meaningful to her and, well, she doesn't seem to give a rip about anyone around her. So on this particular encounter, I stopped asking about her health as I sensed it frustrated her or caused stress and I didn't want to personally be the trigger for her next hospitalization. She professed to being interested in solutions, but clearly she wasn't ready or not THAT interested. She hasn't reached the point of desperation and disability checks allow her to survive without too much financial worry. She doesn't understand everyone is one step away from chemical sensitivity, and try as I may, I can't convince her. If she has my same genes, she's less than a step away!

Being calm and looking very Modigliani...

At one point while we talked, I laughed loudly and she grimaced quickly covering her ears with her hands. My mouth fell open.

"Whoa! Do you have a hearing sensitivity?"

Most definitely. She can't tolerate noise. I shared with her I also have a hearing sensitivity and we compared information. Unfortunately, I failed to walk through the open door! Here was my opportunity to add more about chemical sensitivity and possibly convince her to start taking steps. Hearing sensitivities are a symptom of MCS. But do I continue to harangue her and risk her shutting down again? Damn the dilemma!

We exchanged email addresses and she wrote once. Promising, but that was it. I didn't even do any more quality haranguing in my email! She just stopped. I waited. I wondered if her email wasn't working as she implied she was having issues with it. Tired of waiting, I wrote her a letter enclosing some art she requested. It was long and informative because I figured if she wasn't going to email, I'd at least plant some seeds that might make her think. I told her about my DNA and specific genes that contribute to MCS. I told her it is common for people who have one autoimmune disease to get more. I told her autoimmune diseases are 77% caused by environmental factors, or chemicals. I told her stress is a huge factor and asked her if she realized stress has two forms: mental/emotional and physical. I questioned if she realized all the scented products and junk food she eats might be contributing to her physical stress level and creating autoimmune responses causing the fatigue and digestive problems. I told her a whole lot. It was one long letter! She never responded. It's very frustrating to want to help someone who doesn't want to be helped!

So...if she has my genes, she's screwed! MCS might just be around the corner for her. With women, it often rears its ugly head after age forty when their bodies over time have become overloaded. She has years to go, but she's already showing signs and has an autoimmune disease. I'd like to say I wouldn't wish MCS on my worst enemy, but at the same time, I wish it on everyone! If everyone had MCS, no one would be using toxic products and everyone would be far more tolerant of the chemically sensitive.

Time will tell. I keep holding out she might email me again, but it's been two months. Hmmmm....

The Reality of Autoimmune Disease

This is an awesome article about what it's like to have an autoimmune disease:

 

http://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2013/08/26/whats-wrong-with-me

 

 

 More specifically, what it's like to have Hashimoto's.

 

Love her writing style and her turn of words:

 

“…multiple autoimmune diseases - each slowly developing, in sequence, like a garden coming into terrible bloom.”

 

 I can totally relate to her experiences especially the incompetent doctors and loss of self.

 

I cried my way through the whole article.

 

I get it.

Quote of the Century

"Doctors give drugs of which they know little, into bodies, of which they know less, for diseases of which they know nothing at all."  -Voltaire

Well said, Voltaire!
You'd think medicine would have improved in the last 200 years.
I guess not!
 

I found this quote in the book The Paleo Approach by Sarah Ballantyne.

 

 

The Autoimmune Protocol (AIP) Diet

This New Year's Day was the start of "new beginnings". I'm not clear why, but a friend of mine did something with the date and year and it comes out to "1" and she says it's all about new beginnings. OK.

 

I have newly begun the AIP diet which supposedly reduces intestinal inflammation and helps put all your autoimmune misery in remission. It's very much like the GAPS diet and works by eliminating foods that are difficult to digest to ease your digestive system. After gorging on Paleo desserts for the last week, I'm actually really happy to have a reason to NOT eat more baked goods since most of them destroyed my digestive system. I also recently read if supplements make you ill, which they do, that is sign of a leaky gut. It's been four years since I did the GAPS diet, so it might be time to try something like that again.

I got the information of the website AIP Lifestyle which explains the details.

 

Here's what I have to avoid eating for six to eight weeks:

Grains
Legumes (except green beans and snow peas)
Alternative sweeteners
Dried fruits
Dairy
Processed foods (this would include sugars)
Alcohol
Chocolate
Vegetable oils (except olive, coconut, lard, cultured ghee)
Tapioca (which is a gluten cross-reactor)

Tapioca is the grossest food on the planet so I'm happy not to eat it.

That's pretty much the diet I'm on anyway, but these foods are also restricted:

Nuts and nut oils
Seeds
Eggs
Nightshades (tomatoes, potatoes, peppers, eggplant, paprika, mustard seeds, all chili’s including spices)
Culinary herbs from seeds (mustard, cumin, coriander, fennel, cardamom, fenugreek, caraway, nutmeg, dill seed)

I just recently stopped eating cumin due to advice based on my gene mutations. I do normally eat nuts for protein. Eggs...well, I eat a lot of eggs. Too many for any human to eat. I love eggs. And mayonnaise which is made with eggs.

What I can eat is:

Vegetables (except nightshades)
Fruits (limited to 20 grams per day)
Green beans
Snow peas
Bone broth
Coconut products
Olive oil
Avocados
Bacon fat
Cultured ghee
Fermented foods
Meats (grass-fed, no steroids)
Poultry (free-range, no steroids)
Seafood (wild-caught, even shellfish!)
Vinegars
Honey
Maple Syrup
Herbs from leaves or non-seeds
Gelatin
Arrowroot starch (unless you have adrenal issues)

The notes say some people are sensitive to onions, coconut, and nectarines. I've recently realized coconut might be problematic for me and I don't like nectarines. I may restrict onions, but I've not had a problem with them in the past and they add flavor to things I don't like (like vegetables...meats).

 

After the six to eight weeks, you should add foods back and see if they give you misery. Like I said, the GAPS diet was just like this and I didn't have a problem with eggs, nuts, seeds, or nightshades. We'll see. I'm just going to stay on my Hashimoto's diet so I still plan to avoid ALL sweeteners and I really hate fermented foods so that's not going to happen. I might cheat some with pork (bacon) which is restricted on the Hashimoto's diet, but not on this one. I won't eat much of it as it tastes like pig sweat to me and I can smell it on my skin after I eat it. (That's a clue!)

I just love a good experiment so I'll start 2015 with one for new beginnings.

Things I Learned This Week...

1.) Farting is good for you. It's caused by gut bacteria doing their jobs. I always thought it was a symptom of something not working right.

2.) MCS is thought to be an autoimmune response, or your body attacking the stored toxic chemicals and heavy metals in your fat and organs. Whoa! I KNEW IT! I've been saying this for years. Finally I found a doctor that agrees!

3.) Gargling makes your brain work better.

4.) Dogs are susceptible to Hashimoto's Thyroiditis because of the gluten in their chemically-saturated commercial dog food. I wonder if people know when their dog is showing symptoms or if they think he's just getting old and lazy? How sad. I can't imagine being a dog, feeling so miserable you can't move, and not being able to help yourself.

5.) Lipstick usage is connected to lupus.

6.) People with brain degeneration in the cerebellum area can feel sick from looking at patterns. They are also prone to motion sickness.

7.) Jesus was not a historical person. He's totally fiction. There is absolutely no historical documentation that he ever existed. This is mind boggling to me. Although I do believe Christianity is a outdated cult based on ignorant superstition, I always thought Jesus was a really cool rebellious dude who really lived. One theory is the Romans made him up to control the Jewish revolts of the time. Amazing what we are taught to believe as children and we accept without question as adults.

8.) Chelation should not be done by anyone with chemical sensitivities or autoimmune issues as it forces the heavy metals into your brain and may cause permanent damage. It will make you sicker. When you do get sicker, doctors will often tell you it's just your system detoxing. Nope. That's a lie. I KNEW IT! I've also been saying this for years having been an IV technician who used to administer chelation treatments in a former life. The stuff they pump into your veins smells putrid and unsafe. I'd never put it in my body no matter how many miracle cures are promised to me!

The Paleo Diet with a Hashimoto's Twist

It sounds like a dessert, doesn't it? Or an alcoholic beverage. Both of which I am not allowed. My anti-autoimmune diet is actually the Paleo (Caveman) Diet with a few tweaks. The basic principles are eating what cavemen and cavewomen ate back before we started processing foods beyond recognition: meats, plants and plant products in their most natural forms.

Can't Eat This

What I can eat:

organic beef, chicken, turkey, lamb and fish

most vegetables

fruits, medium to low glycemic value

most herbs and spices

raw nuts, nut butters

olive oil

coconut oil, coconut milk, coconut anything

water, herbal tea

Can't Eat This

The protocol starts with the GAPS diet which is used to heal leaky gut so you are able to digest foods efficiently after you rid yourself of gluten. It's pretty much the same as the Paleo Diet only with a few extra restrictions, for instance, no nuts or any food normally difficult to digest and no eggs as most people have allergies to eggs.

If you would like more details on guidelines and rules:

http://thyroidbook.com/blog/autoimmune-gut-repair-diet/

Can't Eat This

Since I had been partially gluten-free for the past year, I had some practice. Getting strict meant really paying attention to everything I ate and reading the small print on labels. Realizing gluten is in nearly anything processed or canned was an eye-opener. It is hidden in foods like like canned tuna fish (for flavoring), chili powder (it's the anti-caking agent), and some vinegars (made with wheat or as added flavoring). Anything sweetened with barley malt has gluten. Vitamin E is made with gluten so lotions, deodorants, Chapstick, make-up and soaps with Vitamin E are restricted. No matter how many chemicals are in these products, manufacturers think if they put Vitamin E on the label it makes it healthy and more marketable. We are a vitamin addicted people.

I had been trying to reduce my meat intake for a long time in attempt to be healthier and in hopes of reducing our society's dependence on factory farming so I had to re-learn how to cook and eat meat which is amazingly time consuming. Just conditioning myself to remember to take a piece of frozen meat out of the freeze so it would be ready to prepare was hard enough! One of the requirements is to eat protein every two hours so I was spending an extraordinary amount of time planning and preparing meals. I am a prime example of the "fast food generation." We like our food FAST! Sometimes I'd rather not eat than have to take the time to chop up a whole chicken.

I also realized how dependent I was on "filler" foods: pasta, rice, and bread. It's cheap to pack your meat and vegetable dishes with these items as it makes dishes more filling so they go further which also saves money. By eating meat and vegetables, I was HUNGRY most of the time! Well, not hungry, just unsatisfied. And meat is expensive!

Can't Eat This

At first I cheated with dried fruits and bananas, but only because I had to order Kharrazian's book which took a while to get and I didn't quite understand the difference between the Paleo Diet and the Paleo Diet with the Hashimoto's Twist. Giving up sweeteners was difficult and I didn't understand what was high-glycemic and what wasn't so the dried fruits and bananas stayed for too long to compensate for the missing sweets. Other than this glitch, I tackled gluten- sweetener- and dairy-free restrictions with inhuman willpower. Surprising, I know. I can only blame it on desperation.

At about the fourth month, I noticed I was crashing too much. Going without food for too long is not advised. I started experiencing lots of hypoglycemic-type symptoms that I never had before. I decided to add yogurt and rice to the diet, but limited, and I felt much better. I also greatly reduced the dried fruit and stopped eating bananas. I read in the book if you do eat high-glycemic fruits, eat them with protein. I'm learning.

I'm now on the seventh month...with NO weight loss. What!!!? It's a mystery. How can someone give up cookies, cakes, pies, pancakes, butter, jam, potatoes and sour cream and NOT lose weight? I also don't feel less fatigued or exhausted, and at this point I'm thinking the fatigue might be caused by something else. Some information I've come across claims this diet takes up to two years to see a difference. What happened to six months?!

Can't Eat This

I'm not discouraged yet. I did have blood labs redone and my cholesterol has dropped (hooray!), my thyroid levels have increased (this is good - it means the thyroid is working), the TSH has decreased (again, good), but my antibodies have slightly increased although still relatively low. I don't have a clue what is causing the antibodies to increase, but the rest of it is good news. My digestion is wonderful and no more cracked heels, so I am seeing some improvement although not the improvement I expected. I had hoped after six months I'd be bursting with energy. Running marathons, or at least able to ride my bike down the road.

I was also told by current "health care supervisor" (who is actually an acupuncturist who has trained with Kharrazian in nutrition) whatever I decide to do about the diet, DON'T go back to eating gluten. No one should eat gluten. That's fine. Yeah, I miss pie, cake and cookies, but I really don't need to eat any of that stuff and it's not like I'm craving those things. (I did, however, find a gluten-free cupcake the other day that I've been dreaming about.) Based on everything I've been reading, I'm actually afraid to eat gluten now.

Recently I found out I might have Leiden Thrombosis or Factor Five Blood or extra thick blood a condition that does run in my family.  Oddly enough, Paleo diet foods are also blood thinning foods. Coincidental? Hmmm...makes me wonder if there is a connection.

Autoimmune Diseases

When I first started hearing about autoimmune diseases and how the body's immune system attacks itself, it didn't make sense to me. Our bodies aren't designed to attack themselves just for the fun of it, so what is up? I concluded our immune system is attacking something that has infiltrated our bodies, something it sees as a foreign invader and must be removed. Now, what could that be? Yep. Chemicals. I've been alone with my theory for a long time, accused by anyone who didn't want to hear it that my thought processes had been taken over by anti-chemical propaganda and paranoia.

An acquaintance of mine, Heidi, has had lupus for the last fifteen years. About once a year her kidneys fail, she is hospitalized, given chemotherapy treatments, and spends months home-bound recovering her strength. The next time I see her she is unrecognizable. She doesn't expect to live very long. Heidi told me no one knows what causes our bodies to attack themselves.  Hmmm.... When I presented my chemicals-are-our-attackers theory to her, she considered it for a minute until I told her she might feel better if she gave up junk food, coffee, soft drinks, and smoking. She told me I was being ridiculous. Yeah, OK. She's had this disease for fifteen years and I've known about it for fifteen minutes so I figured maybe I don't know what I'm talking about. But my theory is better than no one knows what causes it.

Heidi isn't the only person I know with an autoimmune disease. Three people I know have lupus, several have multiple sclerosis, two have Crohn's disease, one has diabetes and I was diagnosed with Hashimoto's thyroiditis about a year ago. This is just a short sample from a much longer list of diseases considered to be autoimmune-related. Statistics show autoimmune conditions affect 50 million people and it is predicted this should increase to 75 million by 2050. Most are women (same as chemical sensitivity) and if you have one autoimmune disease, there is a high probability you will develop more. I know one woman who has had celiac disease and was recently diagnosed with both lupus and Sjögren syndrome. Triple whammy.

Donna Jackson Nakazawa, author of The Autoimmune Epidemic, believes autoimmunity is caused by...wait for it...ENVIRONMENTAL TOXINS, specifically heavy metals and industrial waste. I'm inclined to include ALL toxins. We are inundated with poisons through air, food, and water. They are stored in our tissues causing our immune systems to attack within in order to remove them. That's what are bodies are supposed to do, unfortunately, it creates an internal war zone making the host feel really lousy in the process.

Ms. Nakazawa's general suggestions read like any chemical sensitivity menu: organic diet, stress avoidance, no cosmetics, dark hair dyes or nail polish, and no chemical household cleaners. Avoid the poisons! The book discusses the risks of supplementation due to conflicting research so there was some indication to avoid manufactured vitamins, minerals and herbs. She implies supplementation might be contributing to the autoimmune epidemic! In addition, we all should adopt a really good detoxification protocol promoting adequate amounts of sunshine (natural Vitamin D), food-source antioxidants, and food-source essential fatty acids.

Also, avoid viruses and DO NOT get vaccines. Ms. Nakazawa presents evidence suggesting viruses are often catalysts for these autoimmune diseases so it stands to reason having viruses purposely pumped into your body is a risk. Just before I became seriously chemically sensitive, I received vaccines for a teaching position. For years I argued with my superiors because I already had all the childhood diseases in question and this natural immunity should fulfill their hoop-jumping requirements. In a moment of weakness, tired of arguing, I caved. Oops. To think we automatically vaccinate our babies before they even get a chance to argue.

The Organic Consumers Association website posted an article on February 21, 2012 about the American Medical Association pushing for mandatory vaccination trials. Are they trying to kill us? Well, yeah! There is a lot of money to be made from autoimmune diseases. This is job security for doctors.

I ran into Heidi at the grocery store the other day. Her face was swollen from the last kidney failure and her grocery cart filled to the brim with junk food.   I just want to scream, "Can't you at least TRY to eat better and make healthier choices to see if it helps!?" But I only smile and keep walking.

Chocolate is Evil

Right around any holiday the chocolate companies start advertising the health benefits of chocolate. For anyone who is addicted this well-planned propaganda seems heaven-sent giving us just one more rational justification for caving to the craving. I've heard chocolate decreases heart disease, improves mood, raises energy, reduces blood pressure, can provide relief from asthma by relaxing bronchial muscles and, last but not least, has an ingredient (phenethylamine) that mimics the feeling of falling in love. Who wouldn't want to feel like they are falling in love? Who needs a high-maintenance man for Valentine's Day when we can have chocolate? I'm sold! As I'm pulling my hair and screaming, "GIVE ME CHOCOLATE," in the back of my rational mind I ask, "Who paid for this so-called research? Mars? Hershey? Nestlé?" $ Cha-ching $ Cha-ching $

What they don't tell you is chocolate may cause headaches, migraines, fatigue, nervous system overstimulation, depression, mood swings, irritability, hyperactivity, feelings of rage, weight gain, premenstrual insanity, autoimmune attacks, heart palpitations, insomnia, heartburn, allergic reactions, acid reflux, sex drive reduction, diabetes, and cancer. It makes you feel in love, but reduces your sex drive? It improves mood, but makes you depressed...at the same time? Am I the only one who sees the contradiction?

I knew someone who was diagnosed with Lyme Disease, suffering greatly with episodes of fatigue and general misery. I kept telling him, "Give up the fancy chocolate, damn it!" AS A TEST He refused citing his entitlement to just one low-cost luxury. The addiction had him by the balls. After two years of treatments and thousands of dollars in medical bills, his liver failed due to all the antibiotics. Unable to function, he was forced to convalesce on the couch and eat very little which involved giving up his gourmet chocolate. His health improved miraculously.  Soon after recovery, he attempted to go back to eating chocolate - all his symptoms and suffering returned. It wasn't Lyme Disease, it was chocolate! Chocolate is evil.

Another friend had bouts of severe depression with thoughts of suicide. After losing her insurance benefits which paid for her very expensive anti-depressants, she desperately asked my advice. Too young to die, she thought, she was willing to give up chocolate and coffee AS A TEST. She made it clear it was only a test. The depression lifted. After a few weeks, the mocha lattes called to her - LOUDLY. She couldn't resist. Within the hour she was ranting, crying, and screaming at her boyfriend for absolute no rational reason. Chocolate is evil.

I'm fairly certain my ten-year old neighbor who suffered from migraines was reacting to chocolate. His mother said the pain was so bad he would hold his head and whimper because crying made it worse. Doctors had no idea why which always sends up red flags for me. As I stood staring at the enormous, half-eaten dark chocolate cake on the counter, I told her my theory and suggested eliminating chocolate from his diet. AS A TEST. She laughed like a maniac and said dripping with addiction, "Oh, he's not going to give up chocolate! He loves it too much!" Who is the parent here? If your child was suffering so greatly wouldn't you try anything? I had a bad feeling about this, but hey, I hardly knew the woman and I wasn't his parent. I couldn't accuse her of child abuse, although I was tempted. Chocolate is evil.

Notice in every story I'm emphasizing AS A TEST. Suggesting anyone to give up chocolate is dangerous. They become hostile.  I usually find myself repeating over and over AS A TEST, JUST A TEST, ONLY A SHORT TEST. Slowly back away.

What I was surprised to find out is chocolate is a cross-reactor to gluten, in other words, it acts like gluten in your system. If you suffer from any kind of gluten sensitivity, celiac disease or autoimmune disease, chocolate will incite an attack and contribute to any of the above mentioned miseries. It is said most people are gluten sensitive in some way.

If health issues aren't convincing enough, I remember years ago some study that came out about the percentage of rat feces and cockroach anatomy found in chocolate bars due to the vermin dancing on top of the wonderful smelling vats and, oops!, falling in. Eeeww! And of course, if it's not "fair trade" then do remember those little cocoa beans were harvested by un-fairly treated children and slaves. Oh yeah! It kills pets, too. That's got to be a clue.

Face it, chocolate is evil. Personified, it would be the devil of food stuffs. It tempts and entices. Few can resist. If you do manage to fight the craving, it calls to you like any drug addiction because IT IS a drug and has been used as such since the beginning of time. The capitalistic money-making machine saw fit to making it into a dessert. Addictions sell.

Kicking the habit is torture. Even knowing all these horrible things, the smell of chocolate can still make me swoon and forget about the rat shit. If you do see the light and are so inclined to give it up AS A TEST, it takes time.  Be patient and strong.  For me it was three weeks of pure hell. After that you will fight the urge for the rest of your life. It never stops calling to you, sweetly and seductively. Your willpower will come from feeling better without it.

I change my mind - maybe a man is less high-maintenance than a chocolate addiction?

Happy Valentine's Day!

Do you eat chocolate? Suffer from any of the above symptoms? Are you willing to give up? Why not?